1 | Mey Kraus | 38 | Coins kept ~ in pockets. |
1 | Richard Grantham | 38 | A breathalyser test = That says "Beer alert!" |
3 | Hans-Peter Reich | 35 | Astonishment = "That son's mine???" |
4 | Tony Crafter | 28 | A) A typical woman. B) A typical man = A) A compliant way? B) Napalm a city! |
5 | Paul Pan | 27 | Romantic song = Mating croons. |
6 | Scott Gardner | 23 | Zero degrees Fahrenheit = Heard the region freezes! |
6 | Rick Rothstein | 23 | I have no regrets, ~ the anger is over. |
8 | Toby Gottfried | 18 | Wet behind the ears = Er ... he'd be new at this. |
9 | palusch | 17 | Personal hygiene = Hey, soap inner leg! |
10 | Don Rogers | 14 | Marriage counseling = Arguing; remain close |
10 | Rosie Perera | 14 | Registered trademark = Marketers regarded it. |
12 | David Bourke | 9 | Eradicating global poverty = All very poor, a gigantic debt. |
13 | Horrid Stretchy Pus | 5 | Growth hormones = Oh, short men grow. |
13 | Adrian Hickford | 5 | A falsetto voice = Feat to vocalise. |
15 | Zoran Radisavlevic | 4 | A strategy = Say target! |
16 | View | 1 | House arrests ~ assure others. |
Total points: | 299 | from 51 votes (DFE factor: 0.314) |
1 | Adrian Hickford | 50 | Academy Award nominees = Cinema nowadays... Dear me! |
2 | Rick Rothstein | 48 | "The Last Supper" (Leonardo da Vinci) ~ pictured the lone Savior and pals. |
3 | Tony Crafter | 43 | Heavy metal bands ~ have blasted many. |
4 | Toby Gottfried | 31 | Cyrano de Bergerac (Edmond Rostand) = Grand romance cratered by odd nose. |
5 | dee4j | 28 | Brad Pitt, Jennifer Aniston = Join 'n' part : bet ain't "Friends"! |
6 | Rosie Perera | 26 | "The Last Supper" by Leonardo da Vinci = Disciples have no party round table. |
7 | Horrid Stretchy Pus | 18 | The documentary, Bowling for Columbine = "Gun-owner Cult, Don't Fib" by Michael Moore. |
7 | Mey Kraus | 18 | 'The Water Lily Pond' by Claude Monet = How learnedly talented... but myopic! |
7 | Scott Gardner | 18 | The Academy Award nominees = Saw an animated comedy here. |
10 | David Bourke | 16 | The actress Imelda Staunton = Talented. Oscar is a must, then! |
11 | View | 4 | New reality show `The will` = I see who`ll try & win wealth. |
12 | stephanemot | 3 | David Beckham is too stupid = Avoid shot at dumb Spice Kid! |
Total points: | 303 | from 51 votes (DFE factor: 0.235) |
1 | Toby Gottfried | 62 | The Second Bush Inauguration = In truth, USA, once is bad enough. |
2 | Rosie Perera | 50 | President's limo = Simpleton's ride. |
3 | Larry Brash | 30 | Voters turned out for the Iraqi elections = A violent terrorist foe not quite crushed. |
3 | Rick Rothstein | 30 | Sumatra, Indonesia= O damn! A sea ruins it. |
5 | Tony Crafter | 28 | No parents, no home, so what is there left for us? = One felt the sorrow of these tsunami orphans. |
6 | Horrid Stretchy Pus | 24 | Fifty wonderful years of Scrabble. Happ... = Fired by this fab half century of word... |
7 | Zoran Radisavlevic | 21 | Sumatra, Indonesia = Tsunami raid on sea. |
8 | Scott Gardner | 17 | The European Space Agency Saturn mission = Huygens cruises, can see moon Titan appear. |
9 | David Bourke | 15 | The anniversary of the liberation of Auschwitz = Nazi holocaust wish rather beaten in 'forty-five. |
10 | dee4j | 14 | California landslides = Nice soil; add rain...falls! |
11 | Joe Fathallah | 9 | Barry Ferguson = Buy for Rangers? |
12 | Mey Kraus | 6 | Man Against Nature = An anger at tsunami. |
Total points: | 306 | from 52 votes (DFE factor: 0.231) |
1 | View | 63 | Actor Sylvester Stallone = Very cool talentless star. |
2 | Mey Kraus | 35 | CEO William Henry Gates the Third = He cried: "Wealth, that's my religion!" |
3 | Larry Brash | 32 | The entertainer Michael Jackson = Eliminate that jerk... he's a concern. |
4 | Tony Crafter | 31 | His Royal Highness, Charles, The Prince... = We hope he'll chastise his self-caring... |
5 | Toby Gottfried | 30 | Achilles: Hero of the Greeks = He rages! He kills foe, Hector! |
6 | Rick Rothstein | 27 | The prophecies of Nostradamus = Forecasts hide upon metaphors. |
7 | KS Mascarenhas | 20 | Insane Saddam Hussein = Indeed! Human Assassin! |
8 | Don Rogers | 15 | Ross Perot = SS trooper. |
9 | David Bourke | 14 | Adriana Iliescu, the world's oldest mother = Toothless old dear: "Er, I'm sure I want a child!" |
9 | Scott Gardner | 14 | Senorita Catalina Sandino Moreno = So, Latina earned Oscar nomination? |
11 | Rosie Perera | 10 | Fashion designer Oscar de la Renta = He adorns leaders in fine rag coats. |
12 | Horrid Stretchy Pus | 8 | Alex Inglethorpe = All Exeter hoping. |
13 | Hans-Peter Reich | 4 | The late William Carson = "I'm a show talent", I recall. |
Total points: | 303 | from 51 votes (DFE factor: 0.255) |
1 | Mey Kraus | 97 | The Leaning Tower of Pisa = I spot one giant flaw here... |
2 | Tony Crafter | 38 | The Syrian Desert = It's...er...sandy there. |
3 | Rosie Perera | 30 | American Society of Civil Engineers = I secretly imagine nice roof caves in. |
4 | palusch | 26 | The Food and Drug Administration ~ had dogmas for nutrition and diet. |
4 | Rick Rothstein | 26 | The Palestinian Authority = Unity in path to hate Israel. |
6 | Hans-Peter Reich | 23 | The Seven Wonders of the ancient world = Evidence shown: tetrahedron's now left! |
7 | Toby Gottfried | 16 | Harley-Davidson motorcycles = Honda lovers decry 'toy' claims. |
8 | Joe Fathallah | 14 | Reebok = BO reek! |
9 | David Bourke | 10 | BMW - The Ultimate Driving Machine = But, within vehicle:- German, dammit! |
10 | Don Rogers | 8 | Compaq Presario personal computers = Square, man. Top microprocessor: Apple! |
11 | Scott Gardner | 6 | The Incredibles = Bit children see. |
12 | Horrid Stretchy Pus | 5 | The League against Cruel Sports = Great pleasure: I close stag hunt. |
Total points: | 299 | from 51 votes (DFE factor: 0.235) |
1 | Scott Gardner | 52 | The children's classic Alice's Adventur... = Discusses a rich, enchanted land Lewis... |
2 | Rosie Perera | 46 | Why does George Mallory desire to climb... = Gold? Glory? More wisdom? Mere novelty... |
3 | Toby Gottfried | 45 | "To err is human, but to really foul thi... = This popular quote is true: great trou... |
4 | David Bourke | 35 | His Royal Highness Prince Harry of Wale... = He's a Royal handful, Diana Spencer's... |
5 | Tony Crafter | 29 | The end of 'Strawberry Fields'. (That lo... = Goodbye. It's sad - children's home of ... |
6 | David A Green | 28 | 'The Little Mermaid and Other Tales' by... = At bedtime his neat children's stories... |
7 | Mey Kraus | 20 | UN General Assembly's Special Session h... = Hoping that the exodus is the last nai... |
8 | AlanY | 16 | The new Oxford Dictionary of National B... = I find arcane, noteworthy British figu... |
9 | Horrid Stretchy Pus | 11 | It is so very amusing to look up "boring... = Grin a lot. In this dour book they prom... |
10 | Larry Brash | 6 | His Royal Highness Prince Harry of Wales... = All fresh reports say how rich charming... |
Total points: | 288 | from 48 votes (DFE factor: 0.208) |
1 | Richard Grantham | 53 | PIANO Softly, in the dusk, a woman is ... = Since I left home, the thing I've foun... |
2 | Tony Crafter | 52 | Apparently, one in five people in the wo... = Inferior logic. It obviously can't be m... (Awardsmaster's Choice Award) |
3 | Paul Pan | 45 | Acknowledging the seven wonders of the ... = Hi, let us assess famed examples of o... |
4 | Toby Gottfried | 29 | Charles Philip Arthur George, Anne Eli... = The children born to Elizabeth II and ... |
5 | David Bourke | 28 | The leader of the Conservative and Unio... = O, that arrant Tory Dracula! "Somethin... |
6 | Rosie Perera | 19 | "We are the first visitors to Titan and... = "We concoct tool, now have seen harsh,... |
Total points: | 226 | from 40 votes (DFE factor: 0.150) |
1 | Mike Keith | 86 | An anagram of Edgar Allan Poe's To Helen |
2 | David Bourke | 41 | Peter Cooke and Dudley Moore sketch |
3 | Richard Grantham | 32 | The Ode to the Amoeba |
4 | Mey Kraus | 30 | Travel Agent (Monty Python) |
5 | Tony Crafter | 13 | Three pieces of advice for men who are aged sixty |
5 | Horrid Stretchy Pus | 13 | A poetic verse in an anagrammatic acrostic |
Total points: | 215 | from 37 votes (DFE factor: 0.162) |
1 | Larry Brash | 59 | The Guinness Book of Records = Fuck! So boring! Needs hooters! |
2 | David Bourke | 48 | I just came in my sleep = Untimely jism escape! |
3 | Mey Kraus | 44 | Stained motel sheets = See that it's old semen. |
4 | Rick Rothstein | 32 | It's her cum-filled slot ~ Christ! It smelled foul! |
5 | Tony Crafter | 22 | German porno flicks = Perform! No slacking! |
6 | Horrid Stretchy Pus | 20 | A mother-fucker ~ from the UK race. |
7 | View | 10 | Menstrual cycle = Care, smelly cunt! |
Total points: | 235 | from 42 votes (DFE factor: 0.167) |
Daniel F. Etter Memorial Award Points*
*Adjusted Points = Sum of (Points * 'DFE factor') |
High Standings
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