| GENERAL | ENTERTAINMENT | TOPICAL | PEOPLES NAMES | OTHER NAMES |
| MEDIUM LENGTH | AWARDSMASTER'S CHALLENGE I | AWARDSMASTER'S CHALLENGE II | LONG | SPECIAL |
| RUDE |
1 | Deano | 32 | 'Slices of bread' ~ describes loaf. |
2 | Mey Kraus | 28 | Professional lion tamer = One's in peril of a lost arm. |
3 | Ellie | 26 | The shoe lover = Hot over heels? |
4 | Paul Pan | 24 | Fascist rule = racist's fuel. |
4 | Andrew | 24 | The bachelor party = Try a cheap brothel. |
6 | Rick | 22 | Well, now I have seen everything! = Oh really? View the evening news! |
7 | David Bourke | 21 | Dead and gone = Aged and done. |
8 | View | 14 | Scum of the Earth = Term of such hate. |
9 | Toby Gottfried | 8 | There's no place like home = Heck, more sleep in a hotel. |
10 | Tony Crafter | 7 | Scrotal impediment in ~ spermicidal ointment. |
11 | aussie battler | 6 | Spring came ~ scampering. |
Total points: | 212 | from 36 votes (DFE factor: 0.306) |
1 | Scott Gardner | 56 | Rembrandt, "The Anatomy Lesson of Dr. N... = Smart men of Holland study inert corps... |
2 | Mey Kraus | 43 | Leonardo da Vinci's "The Last Supper" = Lord Savior and pupils at the scene. |
3 | Tony Crafter | 35 | Milton's 'Paradise Regained'= Serial poem deriding Satan. |
4 | Ellie | 17 | Agatha Christie's Miss Marple = She is aghast at primal crimes! |
4 | View | 17 | The singer Little Richard = Recreated thrilling hits. |
4 | Toby Gottfried | 17 | The Musée du Louvre's Winged Vic... = Much more crying due over view of stat... |
7 | Amir | 11 | The actress Nicole Kidman = One kitsch star led cinema. |
8 | David Bourke | 7 | The Canadian/Portuguese singer Nelly Ki... = A cure to Dido, her funky pulsating si... |
8 | Rick | 7 | The movie 'Superman Returns' = I've superhuman tormenters. |
10 | Zoran Radisavlevic | 3 | Portrait of Adele Bloch-Bauer = For real pathetic boob, Lauder. |
Total points: | 213 | from 36 votes (DFE factor: 0.278) |
1 | Mey Kraus | 47 | The Iranians' nuclear weapons = I can see another war in US plan. |
2 | View | 45 | Christians,Muslims and the Jews = Jerusalem stands within schism. (Awardsmaster's Choice Award) |
3 | ofap | 24 | Abu Musab al-Zarqawi terminated = I'm amazed at war result in Baquba. |
4 | Ellie | 21 | Andre Agassi at Wimbledon = Man, I'd go see a bald star win. |
4 | Don Fortier | 21 | A near-criminal group ran ~ Iranian nuclear program. |
6 | Tony Crafter | 17 | Terror leader Abu Musab al-Zarqawi's te... ~ as USA bomb-team neutralize errant Ira... |
6 | Don Rogers | 17 | Terrorist leader Abu Musab al-Zarqawi e... = Result: A wartime bomber raid neutrali... |
8 | Rick | 8 | The Lawn Tennis Championships at Wimbledon = Competitions... when the 'bald man' plans his win. |
9 | Rosie Perera | 5 | Abu Musab al-Zarqawi is really dead? = A lawless burial. Dubya amazed Iraq. |
Total points: | 205 | from 35 votes (DFE factor: 0.257) |
1 | David Bourke | 41 | Miss Ann Coulter = Nastier columns. |
2 | Mey Kraus | 40 | The former president Saddam Hussein = Punish the arrested man for misdeeds. |
3 | Scott Gardner | 30 | Saint Catherine = A Christian teen. |
4 | Toby Gottfried | 23 | Mathematician Carl Friedrich Gauss = "I, a lad, can figure arithmetic's charms." |
5 | Ellie | 22 | The Irish poet , William Butler Yeats = Illustrate ability here with poems. |
6 | Rick | 21 | The pop singer Britney Spears ~ is pregnant. Pre-birth pose? Yes! |
7 | Tony Crafter | 17 | Senator Joseph Raymond McCarthy = Catch me a major trophy, sonny. Reds! |
Total points: | 194 | from 34 votes (DFE factor: 0.206) |
1 | Toby Gottfried | 46 | The American Dental Association = To attain each smile and no caries. |
2 | Ellie | 33 | The National Pollen and Aerobiology Res... ~ are ideally able to help a running nos... |
3 | Tony Crafter | 32 | England's Manchester International Airport = It costs an arm and leg on an internal trip here. |
4 | Mey Kraus | 28 | Bellagio Hotel and Casino = I lose bet and gain alcohol. |
5 | Don Rogers | 14 | Pythagorean theorem = Me?!? "The, er, hy-pot-a....." (Groan!) |
6 | Rick | 13 | The White and Black Rhinoceros... ~ two horns, hide can be real thick. |
7 | View | 9 | British Airways = Brits, Irish away! |
8 | Larry Brash | 8 | Exodus International = Erudition... not anal sex! |
9 | Scott Gardner | 7 | The Sumatran Rhinoceros = A horn? Snout carries them! |
10 | David Bourke | 2 | The Sacred Guitar Association = Artiste: "A good Christian cause!" |
Total points: | 192 | from 34 votes (DFE factor: 0.294) |
1 | Mey Kraus | 53 | Michael Gerson, top speech-writer to pr... = Having inspected that report, I am bas... |
2 | Ellie | 40 | 'Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La G... = Pointillism as an art: an idea of one ... |
3 | Tony Crafter | 36 | Motion picture "The Da Vinci Code"'s ma... = Intrepid, comic-cut academics investig... |
4 | David Bourke | 32 | "Chew on This: Everything You Didn't Wa... = One study to show rotund, flabby, lard... |
Total points: | 161 | from 28 votes (DFE factor: 0.143) |
1 | Richard G | 30 | England fail, country whimpers. |
2 | Rick | 27 | France may win during hot spell. |
3 | Andrew | 23 | Germans would play French in it. |
4 | Tony Crafter | 16 | Merry England is awful on pitch! |
4 | Hans-Peter Reich | 16 | Poland? France might surely win! |
6 | Ellie | 14 | I'm playing down a French result. |
7 | Toby Gottfried | 13 | England!?! may win the Cup, Sir ? (ROFL) |
8 | Deano | 9 | Largely in Man Utd FC ownership. |
8 | ofap | 9 | England triumph! Wayne frolics. |
10 | Don Rogers | 6 | Fun Nip nightmare: Yellow cards. |
10 | Larry Brash | 6 | My tip - Winner's gold haul: France. |
12 | Mike Mesterton-Gibbons | 5 | Who'll deny Argentina's cup firm? |
12 | David Bourke | 5 | Three Lions fancying plum draw. |
12 | Zoran Radisavlevic | 5 | French player must win a gold in ~... |
12 | Adrian Hickford | 5 | Dutch win, from Spain, generally. |
16 | View | 3 | Why I mourn ? England - first place. |
17 | Mey Kraus | 2 | Italy lads win Frenchmen group. |
18 | Horrid Stretchy Pus | 0 | Merciful as England win trophy. |
Total points: | 194 | from 33 votes (DFE factor: 0.545) |
1 | Larry Brash | 36 | Crushing win led from a penalty. |
1 | Paul Pan | 36 | Champions win, feel truly grand! |
3 | Mey Kraus | 20 | Nap? Screw? Only during halftime! |
4 | Mike Mesterton-Gibbons | 15 | Hear wildly competing fans? Run! |
5 | Horrid Stretchy Pus | 13 | Crap whistler in funny old game. |
5 | Rick | 13 | Fancy goal led winner's triumph. |
7 | Toby Gottfried | 11 | Wonderful match play reigns in ~ ... |
8 | ofap | 10 | Forward muscling in, eh? Penalty! |
9 | David Bourke | 9 | S-G.E. prominent. (And awfully rich!) |
10 | Ellie | 8 | Winning match play led for sure! |
10 | Don Rogers | 8 | Pull in the screaming, rowdy fan. |
12 | Tony Crafter | 6 | Wayne plus girlfriend. Match on! |
13 | Andrew | 4 | They pull in menacing forwards. |
Total points: | 189 | from 33 votes (DFE factor: 0.394) |
1 | Larry Brash | 58 | Two hunters are out in the woods in New Jersey when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be br... |
2 | Mey Kraus | 50 | A man lives on the 10th floor of his apa... = Officers find a short man hanging in a... |
3 | Tony Crafter | 45 | A man came home from work, plopped himse... = I have been the victim of a hellish ro... |
Total points: | 153 | from 27 votes (DFE factor: 0.111) |
1 | Mey Kraus | 41 | Wilfred Owen's Anthem for Doomed Youth. |
2 | David Bourke | 35 | Medway News item |
3 | Tony Crafter | 26 | Asterisks and Ampersands. |
4 | Tony Crafter | 16 | "THE CLOSEST THING TO CRAZY" by Katie Melua |
4 | Mey Kraus | 16 | A limerick containing an anagram anagrammed into another limerick also containing an anagram. |
6 | Tony Crafter | 15 | Thirty days hath September... |
7 | David Bourke | 4 | Asterisks and Apostrophes. |
Total points: | 153 | from 28 votes (DFE factor: 0.250) |
1 | Paul Pan | 39 | Penis reduction = cut in one's pride. |
2 | Mey Kraus | 34 | A shirt's wet? = Saw her tits! |
3 | Rick | 24 | A pleasing shape = Appealing ass, eh? |
4 | Tony Crafter | 20 | The lesbian singers kd lang and Melissa... = Girls in beds, legs astride, and shag ... |
5 | ofap | 15 | Breast reductions ~ secured bra on tits. |
6 | Zoran Radisavlevic | 14 | A big tool = Obligato! |
7 | View | 8 | The breaking of wind = How, after being kind? |
Total points: | 154 | from 28 votes (DFE factor: 0.250) |
Daniel F. Etter Memorial Award Points*
*Adjusted Points = Sum of (Points * 'DFE factor') |
High Standings
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