| GENERAL | ENTERTAINMENT | TOPICAL | PEOPLES NAMES | OTHER NAMES |
| MEDIUM LENGTH | LONG | SPECIAL | RUDE |
1 | Rick Rothstein | 45 | Suicide note = I used it...once! |
2 | Tony Crafter | 36 | Money is the root of all evil = Yet the love of oil is normal? |
3 | Mike Mesterton-Gibbons | 35 | All good things must come to an end = Man, those glad times couldn't go on! |
4 | Meyran Kraus | 32 | A shared illusion ~ is all in our heads. |
5 | Meyran Kraus | 27 | Laughter is the best medicine = In this bad time, glee's the cure. |
6 | Mike Keith | 26 | NINETY/TEN + TWELVE - THREE = TWENTY + ELEVEN - THIRTEEN. (90/10 + 12 - 3 = 20 + 11 - 13 = 18) |
7 | Mike Mesterton-Gibbons | 24 | Caffeine addiction = Coffee in a can did it. |
8 | Christopher Sturdy | 16 | I abhor vegetarianism = I'm against a herbivore. |
9 | Rosie Perera | 8 | The right to peaceful assembly = Public has met together safely. |
10 | Tony Crafter | 5 | A street hooligan ~ looting the areas. |
11 | Meyran Kraus | 3 | The television news broadcast = I see basic world events on that. |
Total points: | 257 | from 43 votes |
1 | Harshal M | 50 | Murals on the Sistine Chapel ceiling = This is Michelangelo's true pinnacle. |
2 | Scott Gardner | 42 | A vodka martini shaken, not stirred = That is a drink one movie star drank. |
3 | Larry Brash | 26 | Colin Firth, Geoffrey Rush star in "The Kings Sp... = S.. s.. sorry.. ar.. it.. its.. er.. not.. f.. ... |
4 | Christopher Sturdy | 19 | To make the dish delicious ~ I'd use the cook Delia Smith. |
5 | Adie Pena | 17 | Bond's adversary = Very badass Dr. No. |
5 | Ellie Dent | 17 | The Silence of the Lambs: a motion picture = One's meal is complete... but for the Chianti. |
7 | nedesto | 16 | Don Quixote by Miguel de Cervantes = Vexing quest coloured by dementia. |
7 | Dharam Khalsa | 16 | Walt Disney movie "Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs" = I saw tiny men whistle, serve, wash, and vow to defend. |
7 | Dean Mayer | 16 | Modern painting = Mind-opening art. |
7 | Adie Pena | 16 | "I saw Mommy kissing Santa Claus" = I am assuming St. Nick was also my ... |
11 | Harshal M | 14 | Leonardo da Vinci's drawing, "The Last Supper" = I arrange twelve pupils and soon add Christ. |
12 | Meyran Kraus | 6 | The Disney animated movie version of 'Snow White' = I'm inside a home with seven tiny one-foot dwarves! |
Total points: | 255 | from 43 votes |
1 | Larry Brash | 36 | Australian Floods = Our island's afloat! |
2 | Andrew Brehaut | 26 | The Apple founder Steve Jobs has died = Dad's leftover iPhone just shed a beep. |
3 | Scott Gardner | 23 | The terrorist Osama bin Laden = An order obliterates this man. |
3 | Tony Crafter | 23 | The singer Amy Winehouse is dead = Oh, my. Herein dies a wasted genius. |
5 | Adie Pena | 22 | The Italian PM Silvio Berlusconi = Politician bullshit is over. Amen! |
6 | View | 20 | Nuclear disaster at Fukushima = Tsunami rush caused a rift & leak. |
7 | Dharam Khalsa | 19 | Man is accidentally shot by his own dog = And I'd say, somewhat consolingly, "Bitch!" |
8 | Ellie Dent | 18 | Tripoli unrest ~ interrupts oil. |
9 | Meyran Kraus | 17 | The US Representative Anthony D. Weiner = Your penis? Never send her THAT in a tweet! |
10 | Larry Brash | 16 | United Kingdom Riots = Drunk idiots emoting. |
11 | Ellie Dent | 13 | The upcoming royal wedding of Kate and William = A whole kingdom welcoming nuptial date: Friday. |
12 | Ed Pegg Jr | 10 | National Muscle Growth Day = Doing what comes naturally. |
12 | Meyran Kraus | 10 | The September Eleventh memorial in NY = It mainly helps one remember the event. |
Total points: | 253 | from 43 votes |
1 | Neil Ramsay | 41 | Severiano Ballesteros = Valor es sobresaliente. [This roughly translates to "Courage is outstanding."] |
2 | Meyran Kraus | 34 | Bad people rotting in hell = e.g. Hitler, Pol Pot, Bin Laden. |
3 | View | 32 | Don Corleone = No one colder. |
4 | Adie Pena | 24 | Sir Thomas Sean Connery ‡ He is an ornery Scotsman. |
5 | Rosie Perera | 18 | The American actor and director Charlie Chaplin = I cheer lad in hat and iconic tramp character role. |
6 | Rosie Perera | 17 | Libyan strongman Muammar Gaddafi = Aging, absurd, inflammatory madman. |
7 | David Bourke | 15 | The Tory Prime Minister, David Cameron = Pardon my advice to him...retirement, sir! |
8 | Harshal M | 14 | Francois-Auguste-Rene Rodin = Our genius does art in France. |
8 | David Bourke | 14 | The former Libyan dictator, Colonel Gaddafi = Cold, methodical...a great friend of Tony Blair. |
8 | Tony Crafter | 14 | Catherine, the royal Duchess of Cambridge = Cherish her soft beauty and melodic grace. |
11 | View | 13 | Minister Ya'alon = Israel, my nation. |
11 | Meyran Kraus | 13 | Obama, current leader of the United States = Another term's fate is unclear due to a debt. |
Total points: | 249 | from 43 votes |
1 | Scott Gardner | 41 | The Aston Martin DBS = Mr. Bond's in that seat. |
2 | David Bourke | 36 | New Oxford English Dictionary = Literacy-honing index of words. |
3 | Ivan Andonov | 31 | The Commonwealth of Australia = A home to all who can surf it, mate! |
4 | Larry Brash | 21 | The Periodic Table of Elements = Al, Be, C, Ds, Fe, He, I, Mo, Ne, Po, Re, Te, Ti, Tl..... |
5 | Meyran Kraus | 18 | Commercial Boeing planes = Nice cabins, ample leg-room. |
6 | Dharam Khalsa | 17 | The new McDonald's Happy Meal = Demand healthy McApples now. |
7 | Mike Mesterton-Gibbons | 16 | The Acropolis of Athens = Honor a slice of the past. |
8 | Ed Pegg Jr | 12 | iPhones ~ in E-shop. |
8 | Adie Pena | 12 | The Statue of Liberty, New York = To be truly free, as they know it. |
8 | Tony Crafter | 12 | The British Snoring and Sleep Apnoea Association... = "Can it stop nasal in-breathing noises?" "I ho... |
11 | Dharam Khalsa | 11 | Space Shuttle Endeavour = Launch devotees stare up. |
12 | Larry Brash | 10 | The Leaning Tower of Pisa = Operating while not safe? |
13 | Tony Crafter | 8 | A Rorschach Test = Character shots. |
14 | Meyran Kraus | 4 | Palace Theatre, NY = Enact a play there. |
Total points: | 249 | from 42 votes |
1 | Tony Crafter | 36 | There are skinny boobs (.)(.) There are larger ... = There are normal boobs ( . )( . ) Silicone boo... |
2 | Meyran Kraus | 30 | Monsters that someone made up: Hannibal Lecter ... = Modern creeps that are *real* monsters: Charle... |
3 | Adie Pena | 22 | ... = ... |
3 | Ellie Dent | 22 | One day, this bear walked up to the Hogshead Bar... = 'Cool. But why the big pause?' asked the barten... |
5 | Meyran Kraus | 21 | What is the Answer to the Ultimate Question of L... = Author Adams feels he's quite intuitive when he... |
5 | Tony Crafter | 21 | At an auction of art in Kinloch, a wealthy Germa... ~ £200 as a single reward to anyone who ha... |
7 | Tony Crafter | 18 | Tuff, a Scotsman, sidled into the Glasgow librar... = After pausing a minute, the woman looked icily ... |
8 | Mike Mesterton-Gibbons | 17 | Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's "The Hound of the Baskervilles" ~ had cool Baker St. sleuth in hunt for Devonshire slayer. |
9 | Meyran Kraus | 12 | Women before going out: - Wear dress. - Find sh... = Men getting ready: - Fish a good shirt or sock... |
10 | Adie Pena | 10 | ... = ... |
Total points: | 209 | from 35 votes |
1 | Tony Crafter | 40 | THE TOP TEN GREATEST BRITONS OF ALL TIME (As vot... = 1. Bullish World War II Prime Minister. Beat N... |
2 | Meyran Kraus | 37 | A bunch of cinematic citations taken from AFI's ... = The movies they are from, along with notes: 1... |
3 | Ellie Dent | 28 | A MAN'S GUIDE TO FEMALE ENGLISH 1. You are so m... = 1. You need a shave and you sweat a lot 2. I h... |
4 | Harshal M | 20 | The Washington Post holds an annual word competi... = So just as before, go approach and explore bea... |
5 | Larry Brash | 15 | IS THERE SEX AFTER DEATH? An older married coup... = A man in Brisbane rings his son in Adelaide ab... |
5 | Tony Crafter | 15 | Two Irish brothers, Patrick and Connor McGough, ... = Miss Beatrice, the church organist, was eighty... |
7 | Tony Crafter | 14 | ... = 1. The King. 2. Liverpool group. 3. Tranquiliz... |
8 | Meyran Kraus | 13 | ... = ... |
9 | nedesto | 9 | A woman awoke to find that her husband wasn't in... = Chad was in a mess of man-trouble again. He ha... |
Total points: | 191 | from 32 votes |
1 | Meyran Kraus | 37 | The full lyrics of the song "Tears Dry On Their Own" |
2 | Meyran Kraus | 29 | A sonnet by Shakespeare, anagrammed into another sonnet which commemorates Jobs in 3 ways. |
3 | Meyran Kraus | 25 | Caelica 86 |
4 | Dharam Khalsa | 16 | Autobiography |
5 | Adie Pena | 12 | Afternoon In February |
6 | Adie Pena | 11 | Aoi Sorawa |
7 | Harshal M | 10 | Clair de Lune |
7 | Tony Crafter | 10 | Autobiography [version II] |
9 | Adie Pena | 7 | January 1939 |
10 | Dharam Khalsa | 4 | Here are a few of the best text message abbreviations that have been used by seniors in social networking. |
10 | Tony Crafter | 4 | Antarctica |
12 | David Bourke | 0 | Autobiography [version III] |
12 | David Bourke | 0 | A list of 90 key facts about The Duke of Edinburgh |
Total points: | 165 | from 29 votes |
1 | nedesto | 39 | His epic orgasm = Seismographic! |
2 | Meyran Kraus | 28 | The lubricated penis = Bet it can slide up her! |
3 | Meyran Kraus | 27 | Huge motorcar to magnify one's penis? = You are compensating for something. |
4 | Rick Rothstein | 20 | Catherine Middleton = "Mind the erection, lad!" |
4 | View | 20 | A penis surgery = Guyness repair. |
6 | David Bourke | 17 | The sado-masochist bondage party = Hasty orgasm, chained to a bedpost! |
7 | nedesto | 16 | A fart is ~ fast air. |
8 | Meyran Kraus | 12 | The octogenarian = "Got an erection?! Ha!" |
9 | Larry Brash | 9 | The Bristol Stool Scale = Shit selectors' lab tool. |
10 | Rick Rothstein | 7 | Making love in bed = Medieval "bonking". |
11 | Wayne Baisley | 0 | Remington ~ Mingetron. |
Total points: | 195 | from 33 votes |
1 | Rick Rothstein | 21 | Suicide note = I used it...once! |
2 | Meyran Kraus | 12 | A shared illusion ~ is all in our heads. |
3 | Larry Brash | 10 | Colin Firth, Geoffrey Rush star in "The Kings Sp... = S.. s.. sorry.. ar.. it.. its.. er.. not.. f.. ... |
4 | Mike Mesterton-Gibbons | 10 | All good things must come to an end = Man, those glad times couldn't go on! |
5 | Harshal M | 10 | Murals on the Sistine Chapel ceiling = This is Michelangelo's true pinnacle. |
6 | nedesto | 9 | Don Quixote by Miguel de Cervantes = Vexing quest coloured by dementia. |
7 | Neil Ramsay | 9 | Severiano Ballesteros = Valor es sobresaliente. [This roughly translates to "Courage is outstanding."] |
8 | Tony Crafter | 8 | Money is the root of all evil = Yet the love of oil is normal? |
9 | Andrew Brehaut | 7 | The Apple founder Steve Jobs has died = Dad's leftover iPhone just shed a beep. |
10 | Mike Keith | 7 | NINETY/TEN + TWELVE - THREE = TWENTY + ELEVEN - THIRTEEN. (90/10 + 12 - 3 = 20 + 11 - 13 = 18) |
11 | Dharam Khalsa | 6 | Man is accidentally shot by his own dog = And I'd say, somewhat consolingly, "Bitch!" |
12 | Mike Mesterton-Gibbons | 6 | The Acropolis of Athens = Honor a slice of the past. |
13 | Christopher Sturdy | 6 | To make the dish delicious ~ I'd use the cook Delia Smith. |
14 | Christopher Sturdy | 6 | I abhor vegetarianism = I'm against a herbivore. |
15 | Meyran Kraus | 6 | The US Representative Anthony D. Weiner = Your penis? Never send her THAT in a tweet! |
16 | Adie Pena | 6 | Sir Thomas Sean Connery ‡ He is an ornery Scotsman. |
17 | Meyran Kraus | 6 | Bad people rotting in hell = e.g. Hitler, Pol Pot, Bin Laden. |
18 | Tony Crafter | 6 | The singer Amy Winehouse is dead = Oh, my. Herein dies a wasted genius. |
19 | Larry Brash | 6 | Australian Floods = Our island's afloat! |
20 | David Bourke | 5 | New Oxford English Dictionary = Literacy-honing index of words. |
21 | Ivan Andonov | 5 | The Commonwealth of Australia = A home to all who can surf it, mate! |
22 | Larry Brash | 5 | United Kingdom Riots = Drunk idiots emoting. |
23 | Scott Gardner | 4 | The Aston Martin DBS = Mr. Bond's in that seat. |
24 | Rosie Perera | 4 | Libyan strongman Muammar Gaddafi = Aging, absurd, inflammatory madman. |
25 | Scott Gardner | 4 | The terrorist Osama bin Laden = An order obliterates this man. |
26 | Ed Pegg Jr | 3 | National Muscle Growth Day = Doing what comes naturally. |
27 | Larry Brash | 3 | The Leaning Tower of Pisa = Operating while not safe? |
28 | View | 3 | Nuclear disaster at Fukushima = Tsunami rush caused a rift & leak. |
29 | Dean Mayer | 3 | Modern painting = Mind-opening art. |
30 | Adie Pena | 3 | "I saw Mommy kissing Santa Claus" = I am assuming St. Nick was also my ... |
31 | Scott Gardner | 2 | A vodka martini shaken, not stirred = That is a drink one movie star drank. |
32 | Harshal M | 2 | Leonardo da Vinci's drawing, "The Last Supper" = I arrange twelve pupils and soon add Christ. |
33 | Tony Crafter | 2 | The British Snoring and Sleep Apnoea Association... = "Can it stop nasal in-breathing noises?" "I ho... |
34 | Adie Pena | 2 | Bond's adversary = Very badass Dr. No. |
35 | View | 2 | Don Corleone = No one colder. |
36 | Ellie Dent | 2 | Tripoli unrest ~ interrupts oil. |
37 | Dharam Khalsa | 2 | Walt Disney movie "Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs" = I saw tiny men whistle, serve, wash, and vow to defend. |
38 | View | 2 | Minister Ya'alon = Israel, my nation. |
39 | Mike Mesterton-Gibbons | 2 | Caffeine addiction = Coffee in a can did it. |
40 | Meyran Kraus | 2 | Obama, current leader of the United States = Another term's fate is unclear due to a debt. |
41 | Ellie Dent | 2 | The Silence of the Lambs: a motion picture = One's meal is complete... but for the Chianti. |
42 | Rosie Perera | 1 | The American actor and director Charlie Chaplin = I cheer lad in hat and iconic tramp character role. |
43 | Meyran Kraus | 1 | Laughter is the best medicine = In this bad time, glee's the cure. |
44 | Larry Brash | 1 | The Periodic Table of Elements = Al, Be, C, Ds, Fe, He, I, Mo, Ne, Po, Re, Te, Ti, Tl..... |
Total points: | 224 | from 38 votes |
1 | Meyran Kraus | 29 | The full lyrics of the song "Tears Dry On Their Own" |
2 | Meyran Kraus | 20 | Caelica 86 |
3 | Meyran Kraus | 15 | A sonnet by Shakespeare, anagrammed into another sonnet which commemorates Jobs in 3 ways. |
4 | Tony Crafter | 11 | There are skinny boobs (.)(.) There are larger ... = There are normal boobs ( . )( . ) Silicone boo... |
5 | Meyran Kraus | 11 | A bunch of cinematic citations taken from AFI's ... = The movies they are from, along with notes: 1... |
6 | Tony Crafter | 9 | THE TOP TEN GREATEST BRITONS OF ALL TIME (As vot... = 1. Bullish World War II Prime Minister. Beat N... |
7 | Ellie Dent | 9 | A MAN'S GUIDE TO FEMALE ENGLISH 1. You are so m... = 1. You need a shave and you sweat a lot 2. I h... |
8 | Adie Pena | 7 | Afternoon In February |
9 | Dharam Khalsa | 6 | Autobiography |
10 | Meyran Kraus | 5 | What is the Answer to the Ultimate Question of L... = Author Adams feels he's quite intuitive when he... |
11 | Harshal M | 5 | Clair de Lune |
12 | Ellie Dent | 5 | One day, this bear walked up to the Hogshead Bar... = 'Cool. But why the big pause?' asked the barten... |
13 | Adie Pena | 4 | ... = ... |
14 | Tony Crafter | 4 | At an auction of art in Kinloch, a wealthy Germa... ~ £200 as a single reward to anyone who ha... |
15 | Meyran Kraus | 4 | Monsters that someone made up: Hannibal Lecter ... = Modern creeps that are *real* monsters: Charle... |
16 | Tony Crafter | 3 | Autobiography [version II] |
17 | Tony Crafter | 3 | Two Irish brothers, Patrick and Connor McGough, ... = Miss Beatrice, the church organist, was eighty... |
18 | Harshal M | 3 | The Washington Post holds an annual word competi... = So just as before, go approach and explore bea... |
19 | Adie Pena | 2 | ... = ... |
20 | Larry Brash | 2 | IS THERE SEX AFTER DEATH? An older married coup... = A man in Brisbane rings his son in Adelaide ab... |
21 | Mike Mesterton-Gibbons | 2 | Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's "The Hound of the Baskervilles" ~ had cool Baker St. sleuth in hunt for Devonshire slayer. |
22 | Tony Crafter | 2 | ... = 1. The King. 2. Liverpool group. 3. Tranquiliz... |
23 | Meyran Kraus | 1 | Women before going out: - Wear dress. - Find sh... = Men getting ready: - Fish a good shirt or sock... |
24 | Meyran Kraus | 1 | ... = ... |
25 | Adie Pena | 1 | January 1939 |
26 | Adie Pena | 1 | Aoi Sorawa |
Total points: | 165 | from 28 votes |
High Standings
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