Complete list of nominations for May 2004

MAY 2004 NOMINATIONS

Anagrammy Awards > Nomination Archives > 2004

THE OTHER NAMES CATEGORY

1st - Richard Grantham with:
A McDonald's restaurant =
Standard U.S. carton meal.

2nd - David A. Green with:
Grecian Plus Gray Control Foam ~
May return color of aging scalp.

3rd - Toby Gottfried with:
Harley-Davidson motorcycle ~
calmly drove on the icy roads.

David Bourke with:
The Weizmann Institute of Science, Rehovot. =
Fun? None whatsoever, to the Semitic citizen.

David Bourke with:
The White House, Washington D.C. =
Oh God! Watch the swine in the U.S.!

Larry Brash with:
Coronary artery bypass graft operation ~
can repair party boy's sore or fatty organ.

Larry Brash with:
The Prudential Assurance Company Limited =
and minute rules meant Death Policy is crap.

Tony Crafter with:
Worm: Netsky.P ~
knew my ports.

Tony Crafter with:
The Asda & Wal-Mart supermarket chain =
What, I am a dual Marks & Spencer threat?

Crispy with:
Land Rover Discovery =
Very old car drives on.

Chris Doyle with:
The Volkswagen Touareg =
We gather, look, get an SUV.

Jesse Frankovich with:
The Chicago Tribune Sports Section =
Hint: I prognosticate the Cubs score.

Toby Gottfried with:
Los Angeles, California =
I call a long fire season.

David A. Green with:
The Dorset and Wiltshire Archery Association =
Incident arises: idly shot arrows at each other.

David A. Green with:
The United Association of Crane Operators =
So, does raise a ton of that concrete up in air.

Adrian Hickford with:
International Space Station =
Not an airplane (to a scientist).

Zoran Radisavlevic with:
Russian revolution =
Oui, our Lenin vs. Tsar!

Rick Rothstein with:
The Prudential Assurance Company Limited =
Client orders 'pay in a nice lump sum' at death.

Rick Rothstein with:
The Medical Journal of Australia ~
held out a major Asian Flu article.

View with:
The Weizmann Institute of Science, Rehovot =
New chemists often active out there in Zion.

THE MEDIUM LENGTH CATEGORY

1st - Larry Brash with:
The late John Lennon, Sir Paul McCartney, the late George Harrison, and Ringo Starr =
In long careers, they all once sang major hits in a rather talented Northern group.

2nd - GOLDFERN with:
TAPS
Day is done
Gone the sun
From the hills
From the lake
From the skies
All is well
Safely rest
God is nigh
=
GENESIS
Let light effuse
OKAY!
Form the world
A hilly spa
Form the man
This his likeness
God's all done
Rest

3rd - David Bourke with:
The President of The United States of America, George Walker Bush =
"Seek Bin Laden!" He set out after Osama, he screwed right up. Forget it!

David Bourke with:
The Serbia and Montenegro Eurovision Song Contest entry, 'Lane Moje' by Zeljko Joksimovic =
Jeez, no! Come on! This song, just some Balkan joke?
It's one very boring drone! Me, at vote, I cry "Nil!"

David Bourke with:
The Sydney Opera House, situated at Bennelong Point. =
Outstanding boat-shaped eye-opener, then you listen!

Tony Crafter with:
'Don't sleep in the subway darling, don't stand in the pouring rain' =
Hit by Petula warning: 'No dossing under the road; it isn't planned!

Jesse Frankovich with:
President Bush recently said that Michigan roads need a lot of improvement =
And yet the Commander in Chief *vetoed* (emphasis urged) transportation bills?

Toby Gottfried with:
From the Halls of Montezuma to the shores of Tripoli ... =
The US Marines zoom off to patrol this hot hell for me.

David A. Green with:
A Murder Mystery Weekend at Dunalastair Hotel, Loch Rannoch =
Amateur sleuths mean to try and crack who'd really done her in.

David A. Green with:
Hackworthy and Sons, the office removal specialists =
They come in a van to shift a fellow's PC, desks or chairs.

David A. Green with:
Ruslana from the Ukraine wins the Eurovision Song Contest =
So, Russian singer in tunic of leather won more votes than UK.

David A. Green with:
'The New Encyclopaedia of Stage Hypnotism' by Ormond McGill =
Becoming sleepy... dopy... then my God, how I fall into scam trance.

David A. Green with:
The Royal Horticultural Society Chelsea Flower Show =
Hear they cut a whole lot of lilacs or curly white roses

Adrian Hickford with:
Davy Jones, Mike Nesmith, Micky Dolenz and Peter Tork. =
It's "The Monkees" on TV: Dimple-Kid, Crazy-Man, Jokey, Nerd.

Adrian Hickford with:
Paris, London, Madrid, New York, Rio de Janeiro, Moscow, Leipzig, Istanbul and Havana =
Rival Olympic bid organizations now seek a dear, splendid win and a major honour.

Meyran Kraus with:
The Tarantino action film "Kill Bill: Volume Two" opens in theaters across the United States =
So, attractive blonde within it can tolerate more fists to the skull than a Minnelli spouse?

THE AWARDSMASTER'S CHALLENGE CATEGORY

1st - Meyran Kraus with:
Senator Kerry claims that Bush's foreign policy is "Ineffective" =
So sorry if I'm coarse, but try asking if the chief can even *spell* it.

2nd - Jesse Frankovich with:
Earth Day: April twenty-second =
Hardy planet? We CAN destroy it!

3rd - Chris Doyle with:
Paris Hilton =
Hi! (Loins part.)

David Bourke with:
The leader of the Hamas organisation Abdel Aziz Rantisi is assassinated by Israel =
Easy Gaza death satisfies Ariel Sharon's bloodthirstiness, anti-Arab zeal in media.

Larry Brash with:
Should the Iraq War be continued? =
Hear a blended chorus: "Quit it now!"

Larry Brash with:
Mujahedin =
Menu? Jihad!

Chris Doyle with:
One nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all. =
Or one Bible nation, riddled with injustice for all uninvited gays?

Jesse Frankovich with:
The increasing war budget =
G. W. Bush created it in anger.

Toby Gottfried with:
The Iraqi Governing Council =
Acquiring oil, then covering.

Toby Gottfried with:
Special commission investigates terrorist attacks =
Strong testimonies critical over CIA's past mistakes.

Richard Grantham with:
Porn Company to Release the Paris Hilton Video =
Noisy lovers happen to procreate in a dim hotel.

Richard Grantham with:
President George W. Bush ('Dubya')=
Bugger washed up by desertion.

Zoran Radisavlevic with:
Kevin Garnett, player of Minnesota Timberwolves =
NBA voters may like new generations for MVP title!

THE LONG CATEGORY

1st - David Bourke with:
I, George Walker Bush, do solemnly swear that
I will faithfully execute the office of President
of the United States and will, to the best of my
ability, preserve, protect, and defend the
Constitution of the United States
=
I, Tony Blair, swear I will ignore the wishes of
the electorate, veto, not listen, feed the media
tittle-tattle/hype, suck up to Bush, fix-up student
fees, defeat the lefties, and stuff Gordon Brown.
Democracy? Totally finished!

2nd - Toby Gottfried with:
The Statue of Liberty
Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore,
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door
=
The Statue of Li-bush-ty
Give me your ire, your war,
Heated fears of Moslems help elect me,
Obey the Bushes: I need order - they restore.
Please, Egypt, do send demented terrorists to me,
I lift my guns high to send freedom out the door.

3rd - Larry Brash with:
Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination. Neither shalt thou lie with any beast to defile thyself therewith; neither shall any woman stand before a beast to lie down thereto: it is confusion. Defile not ye yourselves in any of these things for: in all these the nations are defiled which I cast out before you.

=

Leviticus 18: 22-24

Hate the shirtlifters, the gay bar ninnies, the rent boys. Don't simulate a ladylike fashion when with one's fellow men. This is a detestable union! We intend to do it while with hetero dames only.

No bestiality, eh? HELLO! It is sick! When one has a heifer, doe, buffalo, hen, or any sort of fauna, don't touch it in that sort of intimate way.

Tony Crafter with:
"I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up; live out the true meaning of its creed" =
Martin Luther had a one-time vision: to value life, unite a race. Yet the sight's now dead. R.I.P.

Chris Doyle with:
I, George Walker Bush, do solemnly swear that I will faithfully execute the office of President of the United States and will, to the best of my ability, preserve, protect, and defend the Constitution of the United States.
=
We, Karl Rove and G.W. Bush, do solemnly swear that we'll faithfully disinfect this here tainted office of President and, to the best of our ability, update the effete Constitution to help us to get elected next time. Yes, sir.

Adrian Hickford with:
Syzygy:
The straight line configuration of three celestial bodies (as the sun and earth and moon) in a gravitational system. =
It also means that amazing heavenly attitude is the astonishing coincidental synergy of our fiery star and other globes.

THE SPECIAL CATEGORY

1st - Meyran Kraus with:
A Tribute to the Month of May

2nd - Scott Gardner with:
[A loose rendition of Jesus' life in anagrams of "The Gospel According to Saint Matthew."]

The Gospel According to Saint Matthew =

[Birth:]
Chaste mother got digs at place in town [Luke 2:7]
O, we spot child in that cottage's manger [Luke 2:7]
Magi potentates, on go, watch child rest [2:9-11]

[Ministry:]
Cite how Satan tempted Christ long ago [4:3-11]
Theologian attempts teaching crowds [4:23-25]
Was teaching; that epic sermon got told [5-7]
Oh, no! Castigating crowds at the temple! [21:12-13]

[Last Supper:]
Gal tops head with scarce-got ointment [26:6-7]
Apostles gotta go catch dinner with me [26:17-19]
Iscariot gang now plotted that scheme [26:14-16]
Owing to tips, catch Lord at Gethsemane [26:49-50]

[Passion:]
Aghast, we got Pilate to condemn Christ [27:24-26]
Watch Pilate cage, hit, torment God's son [27:27-31]
Wept... Gang acted to nail Him to the cross [27:27-36]
We can depict His torments at Golgotha [27:33-50]

[Resurrection:]
Light... Women to accept that God's arisen! [28:1-7]
Magdalene wept; Christ to act soothing [28:9-10]
Watch God teach, noting apostles' merit [28:18-20]
Now then, come sit at place at God's right [Mark 16:19]

3rd - Richard Grantham with:
Elegy for a Bachelor Uncle

David Bourke with:
The World Is Full Of Crashing Bores

Joe Fathallah with:
Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?

GOLDFERN with:
Invictus by William Ernest Henley

The Anagrammy Awards

MAY 2004 NOMINATIONS

THE GENERAL CATEGORY

THE ENTERTAINMENT CATEGORY

THE TOPICAL CATEGORY

THE PEOPLE'S NAMES CATEGORY

THE OTHER NAMES CATEGORY

THE MEDIUM LENGTH CATEGORY

THE AWARDSMASTER'S CHALLENGE CATEGORY

THE LONG CATEGORY

THE SPECIAL CATEGORY

THE RUDE CATEGORY