Anagrammy Placegetters for August 2003

All the highly-placed anagrams from the August 2003 Anagrammy Awards.

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THE ENTERTAINMENT CATEGORY

1st - Toby Gottfried with:
Gone with the Wind? =
Then weigh it down!

2nd - Scott Gardner with:
The Video Music Awards =
MTV show is a crude idea.

3rd - Larry Brash with:
The Beatles: John, Paul, George and Ringo =
Let's be the one long-haired ganja group.

THE TOPICAL CATEGORY

1st - Jesse Frankovich with:
The hidden weapons of mass destruction =
No one's found them, as this was predicted.

2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
Could we invade other countries ~
without clear or sound evidence?

3rd - Toby Gottfried with:
"Bush declared healthy in annual physical" =
Punch line held: says he actually had brain.

THE RUDE CATEGORY

1st - Larry Brash with:
The Psychoanalyst Sigmund Freud =
Halt fancying Mother's pussy, Dude.

2nd - David A. Green with:
The Portsmouth Dermatology Centre, St. Mary's Hospital =
Ghastly doctor has plot to put thermometers in my arse!

3rd - Meyran Kraus with:
Easy women =
We moan 'yes!'

THE PEOPLE'S NAMES CATEGORY

1st - Richard Grantham with:
President of the United States of America ~
is a stupid ranter set to demean the office.

2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
The dictator Saddam Hussein =
Mustached sadist ran to hide.

3rd - Zebraboy with:
Esther Williams =
Hell, I miss water.

THE OTHER NAMES CATEGORY

1st - Jesse Frankovich with:
Sport Utility Vehicle =
I've this city polluter.

eq.2nd - David A. Green with:
The American Blind Golfers' Association =
And on occasion a regret if I miss the ball.

eq.2nd - Allan Morley with:
The National Rifle Association =
A lone fanatical shooter is in it.

THE MEDIUM LENGTH CATEGORY

1st - David Bourke with:
"What To Do When Someone Dies: A Legal, Financial and Practical Guide" by Milton Berry Scott
=
A: Bury corpse.
B: Scan will.
C: Find a solicitor.
D: Negotiate all money.
E: Get that new diamond! Ha!

2nd - David A. Green with:
"Lewis Carroll, Photographer of Children: Four Nude Studies" edited by Morton N. Cohen =
Innocent writer, but horror of Charles Dodgson's pedophilia fully documented here.

3rd - Jesse Frankovich with:
Those strange people that work at all the carnivals and county fairs =
Unwashed traveling folk that shall open & operate scary attractions.

THE LONG CATEGORY

1st - Meyran Kraus with:
76th Academy Awards Rules
For Distinguished Achievements During 2003

RULE ONE
AWARDS DEFINITIONS

1. Academy Awards of merit shall be given annually to honor outstanding achievements in theatrically-released feature-length motion pictures, and to honor other achievements as provided for in the rules and approved by the Board of Governors.

=

The heads of the Foundation for Taste in Cinema have devised an apology for any direct or indirect involvement in these sheer stupid movies:

Superman IV
Gigli
Dude, Where's My Car?
Armageddon
Urban Legends: Final Cut
All inane rubbish that features Adam Sandler
The odd Last Action Hero that ran an hour too long
Spice World

We're so very sorry.

2nd - Larry Brash with:
God, grant me the Serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can;
And Wisdom to know the difference.

=

Concede me, tonight, the Confidence
To create fine anagrams,
And, then hoping that when it occurs,
Get eight category wins.

Thanks, God.

3rd - Jesse Frankovich with:
Top Ten Worst Summer Jobs

10. Deposed Iraqi dictator
9. "The New York Times" fact checker
8. French ambassador to the United States
7. Sidewalk Santa
6. Any job where you wear a uniform that reads "Mets"
5. Siegfried and/or Roy
4. "Dennis Kucinich for President" campaign manager
3. Satellite dish salesman, Amish country
2. James Brolin
1. "The Late Show" audience member
=
Top Ten Worst Forum Posts

10. Weekly joke forwards sent here
9. Poor etiquette
8. Any freakish, retarded, or nonsensical jabber
7. Eerie death threats
6. Chronic harassment by jackasses
5. Anything dimwitted, dimwit!
4. Mime dialogue
3. The ads for weird domestic machinery and other unusual enticements
2. Famous classic anagrams
1. The rancid, abominable spam

THE SPECIAL CATEGORY

1st - Meyran Kraus with:
3 Angles to Frost's 'The Road Not Taken'

2nd - Scott Gardner with:
[The famous anagram ELEVEN + TWO = TWELVE + ONE is "triply true," that is,
(1) it's an anagram when spelled out,
(2) it's a anagram of the digits when expressed numerically (11 + 2 = 12 + 1), and
(3) it's a correct equation.
Just for fun, here are a few more "triply true" anagrams:]

A duo + three + number of gospels + a quartet + pints in a gallon + number of American colonies =
a pair + a threesome + number of blind mice + quarts in a gallon + legs on an octopus + fourteen

2 + 3 + 4 + 4 + 8 + 13 =
2 + 3 + 3 + 4 + 8 + 14
[= 34]

An ace + cups in a pint + sides to a story + a threesome + points for a field goal + a quartet + number of seasons + number of golden rings =
one + pints in a quart + Houses of Congress + a menage a trois + feet in a yard + number of gospels + a tetrad + number of Platonic solids

1 + 2 + 2 + 3 + 3 + 4 + 4 + 5 =
1 + 2 + 2 + 3 + 3 + 4 + 4 + 5
[= 24]

A couple + points for a basket + a trio + number of little pigs + sides of a rectangle + a tetrad + sides of a quadrilateral + fingers on a hand + inches in a foot + number of American colonies =
a pair + a deuce + number of blind mice + points for a field goal + quarts in a gallon + faces on a tetrahedron + suits in a deck + toes on a foot + tribes of Israel + stripes on the American flag

2 + 2 + 3 + 3 + 4 + 4 + 4 + 5 + 12 + 13 =
2 + 2 + 3 + 3 + 4 + 4 + 4 + 5 + 12 + 13
[= 52]

A singleton + eyes on a cyclops + a couple + pints in a quart + three + sides of a triangle + a tetrad + number of seasons + points on a pentagram + inches in a foot =
an ace + cents in a penny + legs on a biped + cups in a pint + sides to a story + a threesome + four + quarts in a gallon + toes on a foot + stripes on the American flag

1 + 1 + 2 + 2 + 3 + 3 + 4 + 4 + 5 + 12 =
1 + 1 + 2 + 2 + 2 + 3 + 4 + 4 + 5 + 13
[= 37]

An ace + atomic number of lithium + points for a field goal + a quartet + faces on a tetrahedron + number of golden rings + number of olympic rings + inches in a foot + tribes of Israel + ounces in a pint =
unity + square root of four + number of little pigs + a tetrad + atomic number of boron + fingers on a hand + faces on a die + pence in a shilling + stripes on the American flag + atomic number of silicon

1 + 3 + 3 + 4 + 4 + 5 + 5 + 12 + 12 + 16 =
1 + 2 + 3 + 4 + 5 + 5 + 6 + 12 + 13 + 14
[= 65]

[Note: Where definitions differ, words are used in the American sense rather than the British]

3rd - Richard Grantham with:
[A complete list of numbers up to 10,000 which can be expressed as some sort of power of sums/products of their digits. Note particularly 1024, which can be expressed in two distinct ways (2¹⁰ and 4⁵).]

25 = 5²

121 = 11²

125 [5³] = 5⁽²⁺¹⁾

128 [2⁷] = 2^(8-1)

216 [6³] = 6⁽²⁺¹⁾

289 [17²] = (8+9)²

343 [7³] = (3+4)³

625 [5⁴] = 5^(6-2)

1024 [4⁵ & 2¹⁰] = 4^(10/2) = (4-2)¹⁰

1296 [6⁴] = 6^((9-1)/2)

2187 [3⁷] = ((8/2)-1)⁷

2500 [50²] = 50⁽²⁺⁰⁾

2916 [54²] = (9*6*1)²

3125 [5⁵] = (5*1)⁽³⁺²⁾

3375 [15³] = (3+7+5)³

4096 [4⁶] = (4+(0*9))⁶

5776 [76²] = 76^(7-5)

5832 [18³] = ((5*2)+8)³

9025 [95²] = 95^(2-0)

9216 [96²] = 96^(2*1)

9261 [21³] = 21^(9-6)

THE AWARDSMASTER'S CHALLENGE CATEGORY

This month's challenge was to anagram
Merriam-Webster's Online Dictionary

1st - Richard Grantham with:
Net creation is immense word library.

2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
Bet I can eliminate errors in my words!

3rd - Jesse Frankovich with:
Library site: immense word container.