Anagrammy Placegetters for November 2015

All the highly-placed anagrams from the November 2015 Anagrammy Awards.

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THE GENERAL CATEGORY

1st -

2nd -

3rd -

THE ENTERTAINMENT CATEGORY

1st - Jesse Frankovich with:
The top women's professional tennis player =
Serena Williams oft preys on the opponents.

Eq2nd - Dharam Khalsa with:
"The Story of Goldilocks and the Three Bears" =
Lordy, shock of a girl at rest on the bed sheet!

THE PEOPLES NAMES CATEGORY

1st - Dharam Khalsa with:
US Presidential candidate Hillary Rodham Clinton =
Emails and political innuendo hardly distract her.

2nd - Tony Crafter with:
The Austrian-American Arnold Alois Schwarzenegger =
Senior with a large-size character and a long surname!

3rd - Adie Pena with:
Writer and illustrator Theodor Seuss Geisel =
His treasured stories grew on our little lads.

THE OTHER NAMES CATEGORY

1st - John Ramos with:
Death Valley, California =
I fry in a lava-coated hell.

2nd - David Bourke with:
Bipolar Affective Disorder (manic depression) =
Mood variable: Perfect, fine and crisis periods.

3rd - Jesse Frankovich with:
The Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil =
God grew food in Eden; Eve took the Fall.

THE ANAGRAMMY CHALLENGE CATEGORY

1st - Tony Crafter with:
"We receive three educations:
one from our parents, one from our schoolmaster, and one from the world.
The third contradicts all that the first two teach us." -Baron de Montesquieu
=
Fine comment, sir, but one error:
Mum 'n' Dad teach us love; school teaches us to to read and write; the world teaches terror, fear, confrontation.
The former two equip us to handle this.

2nd - Jesse Frankovich with:
"We receive three educations: one from our parents, one from our schoolmaster, and one from the world. The third contradicts all that the first two teach us." - Baron de Montesquieu
=

After the welcome comforts in home or in scholarship, downtrodden, we learn quite a lot about misfortune, adverse circumstances, and the true horror of death out on the street.

3rd - Dharam Khalsa with:
"We receive three educations:
one from our parents, one from our schoolmaster, and one from the world.
The third contradicts all that the first two teach us."
-Baron de Montesquieu
=
Mother warned tot: "Now, remember P's and Q's!"
Teacher chided uncouth student: "Remain courteous, or off to reform school!"
Irrational adult: "Oh, I often swear at vehicles on the street!"

THE SPECIAL CATEGORY

1st - Jesse Frankovich with:
An acrostic sonnet anagram of Shakespeare's Sonnet 73.

That time of year thou mayst in me behold
When yellow leaves, or none, or few, do hang
Upon those boughs which shake against the cold,
Bare ruin'd choirs, where late the sweet birds sang.
In me thou see'st the twilight of such day
As after sunset fadeth in the west;
Which by and by black night doth take away,
Death's second self, that seals up all in rest.
In me thou see'st the glowing of such fire,
That on the ashes of his youth doth lie,
As the deathbed whereon it must expire,
Consumed with that which it was nourish'd by.
This thou perceiv'st, which makes thy love more strong,
To love that well which thou must leave ere long.

=

This time of year, when weather starts to cool,
Has such a healthy harvest to pursue.
Each teacher and each youth goes back to school;
Fun hayrides through the pumpkin patch ensue.
All Hallows' Eve is nigh, with tasty sweets;
Leaves change in hue; the whirling winds will blow.
Light hours decrease; the end the warmth then meets,
Harsh signs of wintry white about to show.
A blithesome, chatty, most kindhearted mood
Relaxin' with the kiddies in the den,
Vast bounty of seductive hearty food
Enmeshing with a football game (or ten!).
So with the thought of how we feel much blessed,
This season fits, undoubtedly the best.
2nd - Tony Crafter with:
GOLDFINGER
Sung by
Shirley Bassey

Goldfinger
He's the man, the man with the Midas touch
A spider's touch
Such a cold finger
Beckons you to enter his web of sin
But don't go in

Golden words he will pour in your ear
But his lies can't disguise what you fear
For a golden girl knows when he's kissed her
It's the kiss of death from

Mister Goldfinger
Pretty girl beware of this heart of gold
This heart is cold

Golden words he will pour in your ear
But his lies can't disguise what you fear
For a golden girl knows when he's kissed her
It's the kiss of death from

Mister Goldfinger
Pretty girl beware of this heart of gold
This heart is cold

He loves only gold
Only gold
He loves gold
He loves only gold
Only gold
He loves gold

=

GREENFINGERS
Reg 'The Spade-Digger' Todd (Licensed to grow!)

Greenfingers,
He's the guy, the guy with the grower's touch,
A sower's touch.
With his soiled finger
He'll beckon you down to his garden shed,
Don't be misled!

For he doesn't dig you, it's all talk,
All he digs is the earth with a fork,
When he tempts hopeful girls to his bed, it's
A bed of flowers...

Of Mr. Greenfingers,
Sorry, girl, in his world the borders rule,
So don't be fooled!

Though you think it's a budding romance,
He cares more about slugs on his plants,
And lady, you'll only stand half a chance
If you've got worms - forget

Him! Don't linger,
Back off girl, gosh why fool yourself with lies?
His sap won't rise!

He digs only soil
Velvet soil
Lovely soil
Dark, dark soil
He digs soil.

3rd - Christopher Sturdy with:
VI. Autumn Song

Now the leaves are falling fast,
Nurse’s flowers will not last,
Nurses to their graves are gone,
But the prams go rolling on.

Whispering neighbors left and right
Daunt us from our true delight,
Able hands are forced to freeze
Derelict on lonely knees.

Close behind us on our track,
Dead in hundreds cry Alack,
Arms raised stiffly to reprove
In false attitudes of love.

Scrawny through a plundered wood,
Trolls run scolding for their food,
Owl and nightingale are dumb,
And the angel will not come.

Clear, unscalable, ahead
Rise the Mountains of Instead,
From whose cold, cascading streams
None may drink except in dreams.

A poem taken from the series Twelve Songs by W H Auden

A loving message to my mother, Maxine Sturdy
September 2015

=

12 Terms, Gentle Mum

Is it really on to say that loveliness has won the day
If too much dreadful stuff occurs? I'd think it all rather absurd
If all is sorrow, horror, grief, dry one's tears, grit one's teeth
No one's even, all is odd, nothing save the fear of God
As spirits sank to sub zero; sad nadir reached, grim all-time low
Remember mum's love will never cease; son all thankful, on bended knees
Set out sturdy, kept going strong, cheerful laugh and sung a song.
Her life cut short, felt incomplete as an unripened sheaf of wheat.
Pub's now shut, landlord's rung time, wenn man fragt, sagt er 'nein'.
No beer, cigar or sugared tea, GP's max vino per day, 50cc;
Slowed down, becalmed, not very well, once Big C defiled a cell,
Maxi, I mourn a mother dear and so ends now another year

THE RUDE CATEGORY

1st - Scott Gardner with:
Antiflatulence drug =
Nulled acute farting

2nd - Jesse Frankovich with:
Men who use Levitra ~
have lustier women.

3rd - Tony Crafter with:
David Cameron inserted his penis in a dead pig's mouth? =
The shamed PM announces: "Did I, voters? In a pig's ear I did!"