Long Anagram by Richard Grantham
No terrorists here! Join our porn site, turn off the TV, quit
watching the crap happening in the states, and join our free site!
http://1078432703
TUhkwo3199E9BBrQzAPMVMeGDY
0TLoIp53l45I5250.214.114.303516.24Debbie
What will you consume the lost new robots before Tommy does? Roberta,
still washing, spools almost steadily, as the Java defeats near
their Blowfish. Just examining alongside a text beside the underground
is too inner for Cathy to crawl it. We save them, then we firmly
disappear Julieta and Joseph's loud librarian. She might prioritize
familiarly if Neal's pointer isn't orthodox. The IPaddr over the
resilient beanpole is the tablet that slumps neatly. I was infecting
to load you some of my bizarre LANs. Otherwise the package in
Beth's interrupt might defile some sharp Pascals. Quincy contradicts,
then Yolanda rigidly generates a secure opinion around Betty's
network. As undoubtably as Lionel deletes, you can authenticate
the enigma much more wanly. We open the haphazard laptop. Lydia,
under condors foolish and soft, preserves over it, kicking furiously.
Blanche engulfs the input with hers and happily bursts. They are
relaying around the module now, won't substantiate noises later.
Let's produce alongside the worthwhile CERTs, but don't learn
the shiny cables. Norma vends once, pumps daily, then rolls outside
the spool in the watcher. Some llamas question, float, and smile.
What Eve's hard scanner moans, Beth busts against dumb, violent
folders. You won't exclude me inflating outside your cold doorway.
Lately, telephones vexate behind out of date highways, unless
they're idle. Gawd, go eliminate a postmaster! Why doesn't Karen
disrupt lovingly? Both corrupting now, Ayn and Darin interfaced
the old cybercafes for rogue investigator. To be dry or flat will
persevere stupid ISDNs to quickly compile. Never dream the rumours
surprisingly, propagate them inadvertently. Try connecting the
newsgroup's closed hacker and Courtney will train you! He might
flow junk mixmasters in the sticky cosmetic eternity server, whilst
Linette gently starts them too. Nowadays, it proliferates a engineer
too powerful beneath her idiotic complaint desk. Almost no filthy
slow advertisements crudely locate as the messy iterations close.
Are you huge, I mean, tolerating within abysmal programmers? The
fake analyst rarely creates Francine, it transports Kristen instead.
If you will contribute Woodrow's peapod beneath artichokes, it
will partially kill the desktop. Nydia will format the lower buillon
and reboot it in front of its backup. My chaotic FORTRAN won't
jump before I outwit it.
=
Well well. Please give this unworthy wretch the prize for the most inordinately and inexplicably insensitive rubbish I will ever clap eyes upon - with any luck.
Even by spam's low standards this piece of work is bewilderingly depraved. Though before I proceed, I have an admission to make - one which might possibly seem peculiar in the light of my well-known propensity to prey on spam anagrammatically: I really don't particularly dislike spam. Naturally I agree in principle that the wretched stuff's the worst goddamn concept since flares or the invention of the prequel - but in practice I just do not see enough of it to get irritated. Hotmail's Inbox Protector carefully filters out almost all the junk emails that pass my way, and cancelbots perform an invaluable role as USENET sentinels. (That's right, jerk, those same cancelbots you cynically hoodwinked out of killing this rotten dross by inserting all that twaddle in order to resemble a valid post.) Then what little remains I can just skip without it becoming objectionable.
Anyway, it's been a case of out of sight, out of mind... but that was before I met a spammer who was categorically out of HIS mind. I really can draw no other conclusion, particularly as this was posted barely an hour after the atrocity in question... this sort of perverse attitude is bordering on the noxious, and it's only the extraordinary wretchedness of the attacks themselves that prevents me from drawing parallels between you and the terrorists.
That's right, lowlife, despite my formerly relaxed attitude toward the unseemly handiwork of your deluded colleagues I'm all too prepared to make an exception now. This demonstration of sheer enlightenment has driven me to it, thanks very much.
I'm aghast. To insist this abhorrent post is downright intolerable is an understatement - to be frank, it's worse than offensive. It transcends indecency. We're all dazzled and outraged by its unforgivable barbarousness, and we strongly condemn it.
And well may you mutter something along the lines of words will never hurt me, or perhaps that it's all just innocent zeroes and ones really. Well, it's just a darned pity that one of Gary Glitter's lawyers didn't think of this - or he wouldn't be sharing a prison cell now with the likes of you.
So congratulations, pest, you've succeeded quite stupendously in grabbing our attention. It's just a terrible pity you were required to forfeit your membership of the human race in order to do so... although since you're a porn-peddler I'd guess that part probably happened quite some time ago.
I hope you're happy.
[2,089 letters]
This anagram won an Anagrammy in September 2001 (Special Category).
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