Anagrammy Placegetters for February 1999
All the highly-placed anagrams from the February 1999 Anagrammy Awards.
[ Previous month ] [ Back to index ] [ Next month ]THE GENERAL CATEGORY
1st - Wayne Baisley with:
Genetically modified food =
Died of E. coli, FDA lying to me.
2nd - Tom Myers with:
Circumcision operation =
Caution: micro-precision!
3rd - Art Day with:
Fluoride toothpaste =
Fail? So, teeth drop out.
THE ENTERTAINMENT CATEGORY
1st - Steve Krakowski with:
"Treasure Island" by Robert Louis Stevenson =
A lesson's been due, boy! Silver turns traitor.
2nd - Dan Fortier with:
"You've Got Mail" =
I'm a guy to love.
eq.3rd - Larry Brash with:
Rumpole of the Bailey =
Pomeroy. The bail fuel.
eq.3rd - Mick Tully with:
Noddy and Big Ears =
Gay? Sordid. Banned.
THE TOPICAL CATEGORY
1st - Janet Muggeridge with:
Weather forecast: it will be very mild and sunny today =
Met. data didn't tell: rainy, icy, we shovel February snow.
eq.2nd - Mike Hatton with:
Glenn Hoddle sacked =
England's deck holed.
eq.2nd - William Tunstall-Pedoe with:
William Jefferson Clinton, President of the USA =
Intern fellated his penis off. Moral Justice Now!
THE RUDE CATEGORY
1st - Larry Brash with:
Coitus interruptus =
Cunt users rip it out!
2nd - Janet Muggeridge with:
Apologies are NOT accepted. This is alt.anagrams, remember? I
expect nothing less than the rudest of 'grams. Heck... I'd be
disappointed if a few nasty ones didn't pop up! =
Let a mite nest in Rodley's genitals, then he can't screw Brenda.
Get "shampoo", shithead. If orifice goes drip, pop ointment
on tampax pad. Pad pubes. Get AIDS, assfucker!
3rd - William Tunstall-Pedoe with:
William Jefferson Clinton, President of the USA =
Intern fellated; Major lies; Now cut off his penis!
THE SPAM CATEGORY
1st - Paul Equinox Collins with:
A little while back, I was browsing through some newsgroups, just
like you are now. I came across an article similar to this that
said you could make thousands of dollars within weeks with only
an initial investment of six dollars! I thought: "Damn, this
must be a scam and illegal".
=
It was, but as that didn't stop you, you chose to vex us all with
a new incarnation of the same limited story. Oh, I wish this jerk's
cash claims were true, but I know such unmitigated trash is illegal
and lacks kudos. So, we ignore mail or blame? O no! I'll find
anagrams among all this swill.
2nd - Larry Brash with:
Turn your computer into a 24 hr. a day cash machine!! =
A rich spammer (a nut), 24; I hurry to con and cheat you.
3rd - Richard Peers with:
Diet-less Diet Weight Loss No Dieting or Exercising and No Drugs, 100% Refund, Herbs and Vitamins =
100% shit message! Excise this brainless sodding net-turd. Die, die, virgin! O England, frown on turd!
THE LONG CATEGORY
1st - Richard Brodie with:
Can one go upon hot coals, and his feet not be burned? =
So, can he pee on ice and both of gonads not turn blue?
2nd - Larry Brash with:
Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou
amongst women and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy
Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour
of our death. Amen. =
Immaculate and pregnant? Horror! She's deluded about her abdominal
mass. Whose fetus? From where? Your Jewish boyfriend's flesh got
you in the family way, not Mr Ghost! That HRT tale of hers don't
fool us.
3rd - Janet Muggeridge with:
Some penance for making jibes about an unhealthy European diet =
Bread 'n' muesli 'n' bananas 'n' fruit juice keep me on top. Oh yeah, go eat!
THE PEOPLE'S NAMES CATEGORY
1st - Art Day with:
Pat Robertson =
...or bent pastor?
2nd - Janet Muggeridge with:
Sir William MacPherson =
Low Mr Chair - I slip names.
3rd - Mick Tully with:
Lord Louis Mountbatten =
IRA TNT booms - undue toll.
THE OTHER NAMES CATEGORY
1st - Dan Fortier with:
United States Of America =
Its cause: attain freedom.
2nd - Janet Muggeridge with:
Sinclair and Girnigoe Castle =
Gaelic garrison: is it clan den?
3rd - Tom Myers with:
Outback Steakhouses =
Steak about chokes us.
THE ANAGRAM SET CATEGORY
1st - Tom Myers with:
Easter Holiday =
Deathly, I arose!
Arise! Holy date.
Deity heal, soar.
eq.2nd - Richard Brodie with:
Senate Impeachment Trial =
Terminate the Special Man!
Halt intimate menace Pres.
In a statement: Replace him!
eq.2nd - Janet Muggeridge with:
Please don't mention the war =
Tend to weep: Torah men slain.
Demean Hitler POWs? Not neat!
Interned POWs meant alot, eh?
THE SPECIAL CATEGORY
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
The Libyan desert =
Let's be in dry heat!
The Sahara desert =
Ass rather heated...
The Nubian desert =
Burned in the east.
The Gobi desert =
Be hot? Gets dire!
The Great Australian desert =
Gets real arid. Sun? Heat-treat!
2nd - Earle Jones with:
Damn the Torpedoes! =
Metaphors denoted,
Hastened, promoted,
Top anthems eroded,
Phrase not demoted,
The mad prose noted,
Poem ends, throated.
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