Anagrammy Placegetters for February 2000
All the highly-placed anagrams from the February 2000 Anagrammy Awards.
[ Previous month ] [ Back to index ] [ Next month ]THE GENERAL CATEGORY
1st - Jaybur with:
Male chauvinism =
I'm such a vile man.
2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
Ill Old Man Wins Lottery =
Twenty million dollars.
3rd - Janet Muggeridge with:
Hotel lobby =
Hot bell-boy.
THE ENTERTAINMENT CATEGORY
1st - Janet Muggeridge with:
Dame Agatha Christie's famous Belgian detective Monsieur Hercule Poirot =
Crime-fiction egghead sleuth beats a poisoner: "Murder, it has a motive, a clue!"
2nd - Tom Myers with:
Adult Situations, Nudity, Language, Violence =
Indulge in gay education, it's usual on late TV.
3rd - Mick Tully with:
'Vets in Practice' =
Visit cancer pet.
THE TOPICAL CATEGORY
1st - Jon Gearhart with:
South Carolina Republican Primary =
Bush popularity ran o'er liar McCain!
2nd - Janet Muggeridge with:
The doctors' medical report says General Augusto Pinochet is brain damaged =
Sad dotty aging murderer escapes subpoena and trial. Go home to Chile, racist!
3rd - Tom Myers with:
The IRA remains defiant on disarmament =
Sinn Fein: I am a mean, mad, hated terrorist.
THE RUDE CATEGORY
1st - Larry Brash with:
Does a Scotsman wear anything under his kilt? =
Din not know, Mr. Huge testicles and a hairy ass?
2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
A Christmas Present =
Santa's sperm? I retch!
3rd - Tom Myers with:
Everything you wanted to know about sex, but were afraid to ask =
OK twits, devour wet box. Bad taste if you are one naughty wanker.
THE SPAM CATEGORY
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
<seecups@excite.com>
Best Flesh in the West Found at this Tasty Site!!
No Bull At This Site--Just Raw and Pure Pleasure! Over 18 Only
http://3626174393/Pluto/aarne
=
I wish a jury of 12 poor, sexually used teens will sentence that
obese pervert pest, cut his testicles and then put 1,837,439,366
tarantulas up his fat bottom.
2nd - Dan Fortier with:
Soundweapon: America's Secret Police =
We see no crime - suspect old paranoiac.
3rd - Ormasyna with:
Private Investors with Unlimited Funding =
Deep virulent nitwits invading this forum.
THE LONG SPAM CATEGORY
1st - Richard Grantham with:
There was once a Princess who was searching for a Prince so that
she may fall deeply in love She came upon a swamp where she saw
a Frog. She felt a strange attraction for this creature. She cradled
the Frog in her hand, then she kissed him. At once there was a
huge flash of bright white light and the frog disappeared....
only to turn into a Prince!
She loved him at first sight.... and he loved her back...Yum Yum, Yum :) He thrusts forward sweeping her off his feet. They embrace passionately. Then they pause. She suddenly pushes him back and grabs the centre of her dress with both hands, and immediately forces open her dress, It splits down the middle instantly revealing the most beautiful manifestation of the female flesh: thirty-six pounds of firm tasty mouth watering flesh! He moves towards her, lifts her dress and .................
CLICK HERE
PLEASE FORWARD
=
Once upon a time, a pure, shy, innocent little girl was out in the woods collecting her hallucinogenic mushrooms when she came upon this small heap of spam in a marsh. It was an advertisement for a free sex site, and fetid and rotten beneath the surface, but since it was cleverly disguised as this sweet, shy, 'happily ever after' story and looked pretty, she passionately clicked it without further thought.
If only she hadn't... Within seconds she was transported to the far-off, harsh Wicked Kingdom of the Lewd where she was forced to boff everything in sight - sheer ugly fat people, her ferret, hams, trams, cheesy shop dummies, her dead rabbit, her heifer, an eel, a lamp post, farmhands' festering Wellingtons, flagstaffs, dumpsters, the Army, her heels, her arse, her father...
She had a harsh chafe-rash by midnight and she was dead from VD by three.
2nd - Jon Gearhart with:
America's Secret Police
Harassment groups in the United States have obtained advanced
surveillance equipment and non-lethal weapons. These groups do
illegal surveillance of the person they target and then attack
that person with non-lethal weapons. Men, women, and children
with mental conditions are primary targets for these groups but
a person's past history, current behavior, race, and sexual orientation
could also qualify them as a target. Please read about these groups
at the URL listed below. Nothing is for sale. If you have trouble
accessing the web site please email me. Sorry if you receive this
message more than once.
URL: http://ourworld.cs.com/soundweapon/
Thank you,
soundweapon@cs.com
=
Anagrammer's Secret Revenge Plan
Dear Soundweapon,
Hello there, nut! It's quite plain to see this is a passionate plea. All at Alt.Anagrams loved the post so much we're gonna share with the appropos internet provider. I'm sure you'd like us to keep them informed of these illegal activities. They'll probably be contacting to show appreciation, being sure to tell exactly what'll be done and showing how much this post means to them.
In case you're unsure, that's actual sarcasm, stupid fat-headed bastard. A few hours from now your LAN account should be gone, cunt-sinner--closed for service term violations.
Have a nice day!
enragedspamroasterschant@nooneherecares.nowpleaserunquietlyorgetnutscrushed.net
3rd - Larry Brash with:
Hace unos días que estoy buscando la forma de ganar dinero
extra en Internet, recorriendo grupos de noticias,tablones, avisos
clasificados...
=
O no! This is a spam in every language. Trite fools in a lot
of countries send us idiotic dross or coed babe and queer sex
ads or an arcane cancer ad.
THE LONG CATEGORY
1st - Richard Grantham with:
America's Secret Police
Harassment groups in the United States have obtained advanced surveillance equipment and non-lethal weapons. These groups do illegal surveillance of the person they target and then attack that person with non-lethal weapons.
Men, women, and children with mental conditions are primary targets for these groups but a person's past history, current behavior, race, and sexual orientation could also qualify them as a target. Please read about these groups at the URL listed below. Nothing is for sale. If you have trouble accessing the web site please email me. Sorry if you receive this message more than once.
URL: http://ourworld.cs.com/soundweapon/
Thank you, soundweapon@cs.com
=
U.S.A. PARANOIACS' CREED
We believe that you are all out to get us.
We believe God has granted us the right to possess quick-load automatic firearms and shoot proper cyanide-laden armour-piercing bullets as part of normal life.
We believe in Roswell and the total documentary truth of The X-Files; that nasty communists are under the bed; Democrats are a tool of Satan; the U.N. controls the puppet U.S. Congress and that President Clinton's an alien with three million squashy penises; the Net's a CIA plot, as were Vietnam, Lee Harvey Oswald, the men on the Moon, women's rights, Waco, 'race hate', Princess Diana, AOL, nuns, photocopiers...
We believe only God's help (or perhaps carrying a huge gun) can save us.
nutters@bunker.com
2nd - David Bourke with:
Stairway To Heaven
3rd - Richard Brodie with: [Proverbs 3:15 - "She" referring to wisdom.]
She is more precious than rubies: and all the things thou canst
desire are not to be compared unto her. =
So I hear there's not one rich polished thing that's comparable
to education's unnumbered treasures.
THE PEOPLE'S NAMES CATEGORY
1st - David Bourke with:
Leonardo DiCaprio =
Ocean idol, or a drip?
2nd - Tom Myers with:
Millionaire Steve Forbes =
Miserable if loser in vote.
3rd - Jaybur with:
Calista Flockhart and Portia de Rossi =
Lo, alas for cast, odd pair are stick-thin.
THE OTHER NAMES CATEGORY
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
France's Capital =
Clean fact: Paris.
2nd - Richard Grantham with:
I Can't Believe It's Not Butter! =
Notice Vile, Bitter Bun Taste?
THE ANAGRAM SET CATEGORY
1st - Janet Muggeridge with:
Does a Scotsman wear anything under his kilt? =
"Wee hairy nuts," said strong lad Ken Macintosh.
Och an' I hid my knees in Douglas's tartan trews.
Lass in dirt, must wash cardigan, ye ken the noo.
Och 'n' laird sent guests in a dram o' neat whisky.
Wish orgasms so I undid the clan tartan, ye ken.
O Scots Highlanders army kit want nae undies.
2nd - Tom Myers with:
Embarrassing situation =
Mobs staring as I urinate.
So aberrant it is amusing!
A senior is masturbating.
Assuming it's aberration.
3rd - Jaybur with:
Male chauvinism =
I'm such a vile man.
Ha! muscle: I'm vain!
Hum... naive claims.
THE SPECIAL CATEGORY
1st - Richard Grantham with:
Lucy in
the Sky with Diamonds
2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
The
Ten Commandments, each anagrammed separately.
3rd - Richard Grantham with:
The
Night Dances
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