Anagrammy Placegetters for January 2000
All the highly-placed anagrams from the January 2000 Anagrammy Awards.
[ Previous month ] [ Back to index ] [ Next month ]THE GENERAL CATEGORY
1st - Janet Muggeridge with:
Anti-depressants =
Nastiness, depart!
2nd - Art Day with:
Genital herpes =
Lie, shag, repent.
3rd - Daniel F. Etter with:
Death row inmates =
What a monster! Die!!!
THE ENTERTAINMENT CATEGORY
1st - Tom Myers with:
Contains full frontal female nudity =
Nice tan, so artfully flaunted on film.
2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
Hieronymous Bosch's "Creation of the World", "Paradise", "Garden of Earthly Delights" and "Hell". =
Oh, this is a lewd, colorful triptych of a mad Hollander: "Genesis", "Eden", "Abhorrent Orgy", "Hades".
3rd - Jaybur with:
Actor Michael Douglas =
Glamorous ideal catch.
THE TOPICAL CATEGORY
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
The battle for Elian's custody =
Oh stay, little fostered Cuban!
2nd - Janet Muggeridge with:
Deutsche Bank swallowed Morgan Grenfell =
Farewell England. Deutschmark owns globe.
3rd - Jaybur with:
Russian president Yeltsin resigns =
Tipsy inertness as underling rises.
THE RUDE CATEGORY
1st - Tom Myers with:
The traveling salesman =
Vaginas: enters them all!
2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
Winner of a Beauty Contest =
A fine butt to screw, anyone?
3rd - Earle Jones with:
Disenchanted =
Denied snatch.
THE SPAM CATEGORY
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
You Can Easily Stop "Incurable" Herpes Outbreaks Now =
Ah, Can You Eat A Boner, Silly Web-Poster? Suck Our Penis!
2nd - Richard Grantham with:
ADULTS ONLY Like your PORN borderline illegal?? Wanna see a Donkey Show?? Luv Animals?? That's US, Cum take a LOOK =
Hello, anal runt. I shall not seek your usual useless wank-porn, OK - I've got a LLAMA tied down in my backyard! Olé!
3rd - Larry Brash with:
GET YOUR OWN 5 MEG WEBSITE FOR ONLY $11.95 PER MONTH TODAY! =
WHY BET $511.95? YOU DIRTY ROTTEN SPAMMER! NOW GO! GO ON! FLEE!
THE LONG SPAM CATEGORY
1st - Richard Grantham with:
Try IT NOW, IT's Free and it Really does WORK
The makers of Thin & Slim Naturally are so confident that
it will work for you that they will give you a FREE 30 day supply
just for visiting their website: Thin & Slim Naturally suppresses
appetite, boosts energy levels, and burns off unwanted white fat
cells. Thin & Slim Naturally is the best product available
for safe, simple and effective natural weight loss. But don't
take our word for it, try it yourself for a full month... FREE!!
=
Do you feel yourself to be very fat? Doesn't matter whether
you are - I don't care whether you're vast, bulimic or weigh ten
kilograms, I simply want to rip you off fast with this nutty (but
trendy) new water-free diet:
First of all I'll kill, fry up & serve (on buns) any birds,
beasts, rats, insects & pet turtles I find around.
Then for dessert I'll jerk off in a tall glass (until full), pass
it over & call it a Low-Fat, High-Protein Shake. (Smells fine!)
After that, you pay up ($30) and vomit lots. We all win!
2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
Herpes Simplex II, otherwise known as genital herpes, is caused
by a virus that normally remains dormant in the body until it
"wakes up", replicates in mass and causes an outbreak,
usually during times of stress or lowered immune system vitality.
The Herpes viruses are easily transmitted but according to current
generally accepted medical science these viruses still can't be
killed.
=
Web Epidemic, AKA Spammerisis Syndrome: A brain tumor usually
found in perverted computer nerds, who truly think they can harass
us and take our money. Visible signs: Wit loss, sinister eyes,
sexual stimulation while staring at Pamela Lee's tits.
This spam-sending illness can't be cured till every E-Mail harasser,
eccentric pervert and bullshit geek (i.e. you) is castrated, electrocuted
etc.
3rd - Mick Tully with:
My name is Darren Mulligan and I am an aspiring photographer from
California. I will get right to the meat and gravy of this post,
so as not to waste your time!
=
Filming the tots, disgusting, hairy, immoral faggot? Why post
children porn to alt.anagrams area? For mammon, you twisted Irish
pervert?
I alienate a pa? A no-no!
THE LONG CATEGORY
1st - Linda Garrett with:
Mary had a little lamb,
Its fleece was white as snow,
And everywhere that Mary went
The lamb was sure to go.
=
Larry had a smutty goat,
It was really sweet,
Then when he swerved this lawnmower
It became a slab of meat.
2nd - David Bourke with:
Bohemian Rhapsody
3rd - Janet Muggeridge with:
Tomorrow Glaxo Wellcome and Smithkline Beecham are to join up
and form a single large company. =
Legal work - two major firms merge and so annex the global monopoly
on pharmaceutical medicine.
THE PEOPLE'S NAMES CATEGORY
1st - Larry Brash with:
Thomas Alva Edison =
Aha! Ions made volts!
2nd - David Bourke with:
The Reverend Ian Paisley =
He is a "Never Ireland!" type.
3rd - Jean Fontaine with:
Neil Armstrong =
Starring on LEM.
THE OTHER NAMES CATEGORY
1st - Tom Myers with:
Hustler Magazine =
Amazing slut here!
2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
New York, USA =
You wankers!
3rd - Linda Garrett with:
Tasty McDonald's Cheeseburger =
Retch at cold messy greased bun!
THE ANAGRAM SET CATEGORY
1st - Richard Brodie with:
The battle for Elian's custody =
Best thou flee Castro, tiny lad.
Lad's tiny boat left to US. Cheer!
Nice lady lost, but, ah, tot's free!
Ha! Little boy ran, defects to US.
Abduct to Hell? No! It's "Stay free!"
Fidel Castro, the nut, steal boy?
2nd - Janet Muggeridge with:
The smallest room in the house =
Theme: shithole, stools, manure.
O stem, slash here. Hum on toilet.
Arsehole's on the toilet. Hum, Ms!
Short hum on toilet, else shame.
Enema rule: ho, shit them stools!
Let's hear smut in the home's loo.
Reams the slut in the home's loo.
Rush the meal mess into the loo.
Rates the home: loo's in the slum?
Arsehole moment - oh let us shit!
Urinates, smelt the homo's hole.
Hello! sat, met home host's urine.
So the hot urine smell's at home.
Miss tho' seen the loo. Male hurt.
Miss the loo tho' seen the mural.
Hot mess result in the loo. Ahem!
Mess in the loo? Rule: that's home!
3rd - Daniel F. Etter with:
Death row inmates =
Mothers await end.
Date with a sermon.
Dirt to ash. A new me!
What a monster! Die!!!
Waste had no merit.
THE SPECIAL CATEGORY
1st - Mike Keith with:
Anagrams
- Antigrams
eq.2nd - David Bourke with:
[A group of George Michael themed anagrams.]
"No Y-fronts? Let's shag rectum!"
= Songs From The Last Century
A hairy gay Greek go-go musician. (Police sore too!)
= Georgios Kyriacos Panayiotou (George Michael)
Up in Rio, to goose a gay
= Georgios Panayiotou
Gay ring glee: 'Wham!' idol career ended
= George Michael and Andrew Ridgeley
I'm Harrow sex-menace... giggle, eh?
= Ex-'Wham!' singer George Michael
G.M. led cop in, let penetrate asshole!
= The Los Angeles Police Department
Who, me? I'll stalk, rim, roger, rape!
Or: "I'll arrest limp 'Wham!' greeko!"
= The Will Rogers Memorial Park
A cop lubricant
= Club Tropicana
A Public W.C. marathon
= 'Club Tropicana' - Wham!
Wowee! A gay Greek homo bum-pouf
= 'Wake Me Up Before You Go Go' - Wham!
I help screw arses
= Careless Whisper
God! I want that fairy!
= Waiting For That Day
Gay News thrives, then?
= Everything She Wants
Get fairy in romp
Merry? Not if a pig!
Er, fit in gay romp
= Praying For Time
Fag fruit here
= Father Figure
SOS! Lewd gay can nob!
= Cowboys And Angels
Anal-sediment legend
= Ladies And Gentlemen
eq.2nd - Richard Grantham with:
Love
is too young to know what conscience is
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