Anagrammy Placegetters for May 2002
All the highly-placed anagrams from the May 2002 Anagrammy Awards.
[ Previous month ] [ Back to index ] [ Next month ]THE GENERAL CATEGORY
1st - Joe Fathallah with:
The Rat Race =
That career.
2nd - Allan Morley with:
Conspiracy theorist =
Psychotic, or nastier...
3rd - Meyran Kraus with:
Mean doings ~
in God's name.
THE ENTERTAINMENT CATEGORY
eq.1st - Meyran Kraus with:
The Actress Pamela Anderson =
Neat rear, and chest's so ample!
eq.1st - Allan Morley with:
The Death Star =
See that, Darth?
3rd - Jaybur with:
Alfred Lord Tennyson's 'The Lady of Shalott' =
Float then, for noted story shall end sadly.
THE TOPICAL CATEGORY
1st - Adrian Hickford with:
Rail safety =
Fairy tales.
2nd - Allan Morley with:
Presidential election =
I declare it is not Le Pen.
3rd - Meyran Kraus with:
The US Avoided Strong 'September Eleven' Clues =
So it seems slaughter could've been prevented.
THE RUDE CATEGORY
1st - Jaybur with:
'Nevermore' painted by Paul Gauguin =
Giving one nude beauty a plump rear!
2nd - Adrian Hickford with:
Simultaneous =
Mutual noises.
eq.3rd - Richard Grantham with:
The Bush administration =
Shit brain - mouth instead.
eq.3rd - Matjaz Pihler with:
Aphrodisiac... ~
or 'I paid cash'.
THE SPAM CATEGORY
1st - Allan Morley with:
Are YOU PREPARED for a TERRORIST ATTACK?
Then you need the BioChem Survival Manual
What can you do?
Who can you turn to?
Do you know the measures to take to protect you and your family?
If you do not know, you are not alone!
The BioChem Survival Manual Has the answers that you will want and will need to protect, you and those you care about!
The Survival Manual contains information taken directly from the Military's Nuclear Biological Chemical Training Manual, THE Manual used to teach military personnel how to prepare, prevent, identify, protect against and survive an attack.
Developed by BioChem Survival Systems and containing information you can understand in non-military terminology.
Only $24.95 + S&H
Call 113-6780
=
COULD YOU SURVIVE A SPAM ATTACK?
Unwanted and uninvited electronic circulars are not only very wearisome, monotonous, often hideous, inane and highly annoying, but commonly overload and ruin your computer. Thus, you need the SPAM SURVIVAL MANUAL!
1. Take a note of each annoying violation.
2. Attempt to ask each ISP to kindly inactivate each weak-minded,
unmannerly irritant's account.
3. Note the total futility of the above.
4. Phone your attorney.
5. Sulk.
6. Wildly throw random articles across the room.
7. Cut up your computer's modem or cable.
8. Wantonly shatter your monitor with a hatchet, or a small cannon
if available.
9. Last, annihilate your hard drive by playing frisbee with it.
10. You are now totally SPAM FREE, guaranteed!
2nd - Meyran Kraus with: [A troll post]
Shit i'm getting way to old and fat and slow in my older years
i tried to sneak a quickie in before my old man came home and
the friend i was with gave up and left because it takes me so
long to get undressed and to get into a position that he can get
his dink into me. Ya know having ah gut makes it hard to get laid
cause you have to lay on your side with ah leg up over your head
or bend your fat guy over a chair and have the guy use both hands
to lift your ass up so he can find ah wet hole to stick it in
I've been ass fucked more times then pussy fucked because it was
the first hole they could find thanks to not being able to wipe
my ass clean after taking a shit helps.
=
As a way to demystify the above, view this guide of Freud to
the Anal Stage:
"So, as the kids get acquainted with the sphincter, they
stop sucking thumbs and move on to fumbling poo. The kids begin
to notice the innate fun and agony associated with a bowel movement.
They will then run amok and poo around the house day after day
like dogs, unless taught differently.
However, if the parents are too easy and fail to teach society's
rules about poo control, the kid, I assume, will derive a naughty
delight from any ass-drainage in the future, which may induce
a sick, sadistic behavior and a hideous geekiness, that can someday
generate a kinky, bum-poking troll."
3rd - Joe Fathallah with:
You are no doubt asking "What is this inquiry doing on this
news group, which has nothing to do with sex?"
But this is precisely why this type of news group was chosen for this scientific investigation. We want to gather information from ordinary males who are not overly preoccupied with sex, be it heterosexual, homosexual, or pedosexual. We want to get, as much as is possible, a world wide, longitudinal, and to some degree cross cultural set of data. So we ask your open minded consideration of our request, and we ask the indulgence of your webmaster in facilitating this research project by allowing this post to remain.
If you are male, and would like to contribute to this research please go to:
http://shfri.addr.com/w2/wae.html
Thank you for contributing to the advancement of scientific knowledge about the sexuality of boys.
=
So, nitwit maniac fool, do I understand now or do I not? You are looking for "ordinary males who are not overly preoccupied with sex", but you post this message on *this* newsgroup?! You are a fat anal shithead if you think that we, who insist on using such sexual words in our work, are not a totally sex obsessed lot! Words like fuck, shit, cunt, bitch, anal - sex, tosser, laid, screw, threesome, panties, poof and blowjob! If I can recommend reading the rude section of the archives at www.anagrammy.com, which until quite recently were fed by this group (not now though). For example, here are 2 masterpieces of wit to show. One by Lardy....
Clit - piercing = Clip it, cringe!
Another quite sexual one by the great Mey K....
Tight blouse = Oh, tits bulge!
Wow, cool!
Get the picture, sad naive idiot? Afraid now, sod? I insist doing this stuff is not, as often thought, a sad pastime!
THE LONG CATEGORY
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
(This e-mail was distributed on the internet after the September
Eleven events)
My family owns an ambulance service in Brooklyn NY. Midwood Ambulance if anyone knows it. Anyway, my uncles were at "Ground Zero" during the attack to help the victims. They donated their time to help with this crisis as many New Yorkers did. A great deal of people were in shock from the devastation. As many of you know, shock victims are supposed to drink a lot of water. My uncle went to the Starbucks down the street to get bottles of water for the victims he was treating. Can you believe they actually charged him for it!! He paid the $130 for 3 cases of bottled water out of his own pocket. Now, I would think that in a crisis such as this, vendors in the area would be more than happy to lend a little help by donating water. Well, not Starbucks! As if this country hasn't given them enough money! Anyway, the point of this story wasn't to glorify my uncle's actions but to suggest a boycott on Starbucks. Now, I love Frappaccinos as much as anyone, but any company that would try to make a profit off of a crisis like this doesn't deserve the American public's hard earned money. Please forward this e-mail to any one you know and encourage them to do the same.
Thank you!
=
(This signed letter was sent to 'The Papacy')
Kind and Loving Pope,
I'm a Roman Catholic Altar Boy from a Southern Catholic town.
Well, for starters, I'm a great fan, and you have my everlasting
love, but love doesn't cut it for me ever since last April. No
offence, but the new priest you sent here is total crap.
My friend Wayne got two bucks from him. I saw it! He put Wayne's
hands in his own front pockets and trembled or whatever...
*Two bucks*! I never got so much as a *cent*!
Two days later Wayne told me the priest bought him a toy Action
Truck for another little round. God Almighty, I want nice toys
too! I saw a kickass bunny yesterday but mom says it costs a lot
so we can't buy it.
Then I asked the priest if I can get a new toy too, and he said
my hands were unclean! Okay, so I'm often sick with the flu; My
nose's sort of runny and *once in a while* I wipe it with the
back of my hand. So what? Is sneezing a reason to blow me off?
That's plain cruel.
Now I know he likes touching my butt after hymns, and the other
day he offered me to 'kneel and devour his potency' (whatever
that meant), but I prefer the pocket-game and a toy. So could
you please teach our priest to behave? Thanks in advance.
Yours truly,
Tommy Mendes
P.S. Holy wine is cool, but 'Body of Christ' tastes like diarrhea.
2nd - Jaybur with:
I wandered lonely as a cloud
3rd - Richard Brodie with:
Le Pen's gracious concession speech:
"This election was a stinging defeat for hope in France. Chirac's win was an equivocal victory gained by the Soviet method, with the coordination of all the social, political, economic, media forces. I am patient, and will not have to wait long to see the allies in this morbid coalition tear themselves apart."
=
A typical American losing candidate's predictable and insincere load of poo:
"My opponent has won. He is the choice which we have to live with. I, a big loser, choose to smooth over artificial ideological differences, criticism, etc. that mean squat. We now move as total allies in a spirit of uniting the nation." (at least till the Congress convenes!)
THE PEOPLE'S NAMES CATEGORY
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
Chairman Gates =
Mega-rich Satan.
2nd - Allan Morley with:
George Bush and Vladimir Putin =
Brave, triumphing duo sign deal.
3rd - Santi Spadaro with:
Duke Ellington ~
liked long tune.
THE OTHER NAMES CATEGORY
1st - Larry Brash with:
Detoxification and Rehabilitation Centre =
I coax another infantile beer addict into it.
2nd - Richard Grantham with:
The People's Republic of China =
Police happen to crush belief.
3rd - Adrian Hickford with:
Muscovites =
Soviet scum.
THE SPECIAL CATEGORY
1st - Richard Grantham with:
Shakespeare's 102nd
sonnet, anagrammed into a lipogrammatic (W-less) rebuttal decorated with its dedicatee's initials, WH.
2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
Oscar Wilde's 'Madonna Mia', anagrammed into a paraphrase which is also
an acrostic on the author's name. Also, reading down the second-last words of each line reveals a fitting quote (also by Wilde).
3rd - Allan Morley with:
From the
Irish, by Ian Duhig
[ Previous month ] [ Back to index ] [ Next month ]
| Home | | The Anagrammy Awards | Enter the Forum | Facebook | The Team |  |
| Information | | Awards Rules | Forum FAQ | Anagrams FAQ | History | Articles | |
| Resources | | Anagram Artist Software | Generators | On-line | Books | Websites | |
| Archive | | Winners | Nominations | Hall of Fame | Anagrammasia | Literary | |
| Competition | | Vote | Current Nominations | Leader Board | Latest Results | Old Results | Rankings | |
| Miscellaneous | | Tribute Page | Records | Sitemap | Search | Anagram Checker | Email Us | Donate | |
| Anagrammy Awards | © 1998-2024 Last updated 10th May, 2016 |