Anagrammy Placegetters for December 2003

All the highly-placed anagrams from the December 2003 Anagrammy Awards.

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THE TOPICAL CATEGORY

1st - Meyran Kraus with:
Saddam Hussein, the Iraqis' former president =
A squad pried his ass from his retirement den.

2nd - Jesse Frankovich with:
The oldest New Years' Eve tradition =
Resolve to diet as we eat thy dinner!

3rd - Richard Grantham with:
Former President Saddam Hussein al-Tikriti =
Strike finds sad, immature rat in "spider hole".

THE PEOPLE'S NAMES CATEGORY

1st - Jaybur with:
Charles A. Lindbergh =
Bird has challenger?

2nd - sundogg99 with:
James Bond, Secret Agent Double-Oh-Seven =
Suave gentleman, he beds escort. Job done!

3rd - Meyran Kraus with:
Renaissance painter Michelangelo =
Real giant scenes in a chapel in Rome.

THE MEDIUM LENGTH CATEGORY

1st - Jaybur with:
"I believe marriage is between a man and a woman, and I think we ought to codify that one way or another" (George W. Bush) =
I think we need a new law to be encouraging to true mahogany, er, matrimony... and have a good wife to share babies with.

2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
What's the sole difference between America's president and Mussolini? =
I need no faster mind if there's such a simple answer: Benito was *elected*.

eq.3rd - Richard Brodie with:
Saddam Hussein is captured by the Coalition Forces as led by the United States of America.=
Ace of Spades enemy hunt is estimated as crucial to the Arabic oil interests of daddy Bush!

eq.3rd - Jesse Frankovich with:
The pedophilia allegations surrounding Michael Jackson =
Imagine that scandalous (or *lecherous*) Pop King held in jail.

THE LONG CATEGORY

1st - Adrian Hickford with:
People are occasionally having problems with nominations. Teething problems are common with new changes.

The most common problem is making mistake on their nomination, pressing "Post Now", rather than "Review Message", then trying to correct the mistake on their reply (not the original post). The end-result is that the anagram becomes attributed to the nominator not the author.

Helpful tips to overcome this:

1. With all nominations, please use the "Review Message" button.

2. If you have made a mistake, then use your browser's back button and correct the error, and review the message again.

3. If it is correct, then press: "Post this message"

I hope this helps and will mean less work for me to look out for and correct mistakes.

Larry

=

Thanks, Larry (our sometimes spokesperson) for the enlightenment; these three top troubleshooting tips are marvellous.

Nevertheless, more things we must remember when posting to the Forum:

1. When Meyran Kraus has an anagram nominated within a particular category, you might as well not bother posting your pointless one - as he will win the competition himself!

2. Note: please check both the archives prior to being tempted to post discoveries like "A carton of cigarettes - I got a taste for cancer", "A ten-inch dick - Nice and thick" and "Astronomer - Moon-starer."

3. Larry will prohibit, or even remove without comment, bothersome posts (like this unwholesome abomination) that attempt to anagram his messages.

Best wishes,
Adrian.

eq.2nd - Larry Brash with:
On the twelfth day of Christmas

eq.2nd - Allan Morley with:
My name is Kelly LeBlanc, D.D.S. and I am a Cosmetic Dentist in Houston, Texas. I have come to realize that not everyone has the time to take off work to get his or her teeth whitened or bleached.

I have developed a unique system for bleaching your teeth from the comfort of your home and at a fraction of the cost of what it would cost at my or any other dental office.

The normal cost for teeth whitening at my office is $350-$500, but now because of the low cost of purchasing and selling on the Internet, I am able to offer to you the SAME bleaching system for only $99!

That's right, upper and lower teeth bleached as white as you would like them for only $99! There's no unnecessary trip to the dental office or the cost of seeing the dentist or hygienist. This is how I am able to pass the savings to you, your family and friends! Please feel free to forward this e-mail to anyone you know that might benefit from this tremendous offer.

=

Congratulations, feeble moron, for making the effort to realize that 99.99% of us do not have sufficiently flexible work hours (or the money) to accommodate these moronic cosmetic procedures--not to mention recommending that we offend family and friends by telling them that their teeth need to be whitened. It's shameful when a dentist has a cavity, but even worse when that cavity is where your *brain* should be.

Anyhow, let me hypothesise as to the nature of this fine idea of yours, that mystery teeth-whitening system: is it correction fluid? Clear nail polish? A fresh coat of lead-based gloss paint each afternoon?

Yeah, well I've got another teeth-whitening offer to make to you: for a mere $3,550.00 I'll come by your office, take a hefty hammer to your teeth and then squash pieces of soft white chalk into the resulting gaps. The effect is as good or better, and it's almost totally foolproof. So, how does Monday sound?

THE SPECIAL CATEGORY

1st - Richard Grantham with:
A retelling of Mr Daydream by Roger Hargreaves, in which both letters and pictures have been rearranged.

2nd - David Bourke with:
The biography of George W. Bush from the White House website.

3rd - Joe Fathallah with:
Mambo No. 5

THE AWARDSMASTER'S CHALLENGE CATEGORY

This month's Challenge was to create anagrams on a Christmas theme.

1st - Adrian Hickford with:
A school nativity play =
So plan a holy activity.

2nd - Richard Grantham with:
The manger =
Men gather.

3rd - Jaybur with:
Santa Claus (St Nicholas) and his team of reindeer =
Fat man in a scarlet suit has chosen a ride on sled.

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Anagrammy Placegetters for December 2003

THE GENERAL CATEGORY

THE ENTERTAINMENT CATEGORY