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A Plain and Easy Introduction to Practical Music (1597)
The Madrigal.
"As for the music it is, next unto the Motet, the most artificial
and, to men of understanding, most delightful. If therefore you
will compose in this kind you must possess yourself with an amorous
humour (for in no composition shall you prove admirable except
you put on and possess yourself wholly with that vein wherein
you compose), so that you must in your music be wavering like
the wind, sometime wanton, sometime drooping, sometime grave
and staid, otherwhile effeminate; you may maintain points and
revert them, use Triplas, and show the very uttermost of your
variety, and the more variety you show the better shall you
please."
Thomas Morley, Gentleman of the Chapel Royal
(1558-1602)
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A Plain and Easy Introduction to Commercial Music
The Pop Tune
"Hi. Our modern music is well delivered when the artist
has a moody, appealing look. That should mean mondo tits, sumptuous
ass, two hot sexy lips, a vapid toothy facial expression. You
should use silicone to achieve the most yummy or effective tits.
The same for the lips and the bum. Do not worry, the face will
survive on its own merit. You must not emerge in public with
fewer than nine private guards. You must get in the news with
any foolish rumor that may surround you. If there are not any,
someone may start one for you. It will likely improve your image-
the most important of things in life. Also the money, the men,
fame, and shoes too."
For tour dates, do call my manager at 1-555-7062
Britney Spears (1981- )
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