Anagrammy Placegetters for March 2013
All the highly-placed anagrams from the March 2013 Anagrammy Awards.
[ Previous month ] [ Back to index ] [ Next month ]THE GENERAL CATEGORY
1st - nedesto with:
Flowers unfold =
Full of wonders.
eq2nd - Adie Pena with:
A narcotics dealer =
Arrest cocaine lad!
eq2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
The wonderful season of spring =
Open flowers found in the grass.
THE ENTERTAINMENT CATEGORY
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
The fictional hero James Bond =
I often charm ladies on the job.
2nd - Ellie Dent with:
Claude Oscar Monet: Water Lilies series of paintings =
Created sensational images: flower pictures in oils.
3rd - Larry Brash with:
The singer Adele =
A serene delight.
THE TOPICAL CATEGORY
1st - Adie Pena with:
South American Pope ~
has impact on Europe.
2nd - Ed Pegg Jr with:
Venezuela high office ‡
Hugo "I feel fine" Chavez.
3rd - Ellie Dent with:
A snowy Britain ~
saw a tiny robin.
THE PEOPLES NAMES CATEGORY
1st - Meyran Kraus with:
Pope Francis the First =
Perfect for saintship.
2nd - View with:
Alexis Wright =
Sex with a girl.
3rd - Adie Pena with:
Francesco =
Soccer fan.
THE OTHER NAMES CATEGORY
1st - nedesto with:
The Vatican's College of Cardinals =
God's half-secret Italian conclave.
2nd - Tony Crafter with:
The Syrian Arab Republic =
Purely barbarian ethics.
eq3rd - Rosie Perera with:
International Women's Day =
Men (traditional ones) yawn.
eq3rd - Meyran Kraus with:
Gillette's twin-blade head =
I shall get it wet and bleed.
THE MEDIUM LENGTH CATEGORY
1st - Tony Crafter with:
The Five Most Recent Presidents of the USA
1. Ronald Reagan
2. George Bush Snr
3. William Clinton
4. George Bush Jr
5. Barack Obama
=
1. A former B-movie actor.
2. GWB's father
3. Just one stain sin shortened his career
4. English-language mangler
5. Proud to be black
2nd - Scott Gardner with:
1. Great Pyramid
2. Hanging Gardens
3. Statue of Zeus
4. Temple of Artemis
5. Mausoleum
6. Colossus of Rhodes
7. Pharos of Alexandria
=
1. Angled stone
2. Rooftop forest
3. Olympian God
4. Ephesus altar
5. Halicarnassus morgue
6. Maximum-sized feat
7. Safeguard shore
3rd - Adie Pena with:
Heroines of Fairy Tales
1. Snow White
2. Cinderella
3. Sleeping Beauty
4. Rapunzel
5. Little Red Riding Hood
=
1. Ate. Poisoned. Ill.
2. "A sweet prince!"
3. Entirely shut-eyed nubile girl
4. Long-haired
5. Hazard in forest: Wolf
THE ANAGRAMMY CHALLENGE CATEGORY
1st - Larry Brash with:
Habemus Papam;
Eminentissimum ac reverendissimum Dominum,
Dominum Georgium Sanctae Romanae Ecclesiae Cardinalem Bergoglio,
Qui sibi nomen imposuit Franciscum.
=
I'm so great,
I'm a success,
I'm an ace academic,
I'm no communist,
I'm unmarried,
I'm beloved, unique, superb fun
I'm a blessed man
I'm religious
I'm no carousing German man
I'm the Pope!
THE LONG CATEGORY
1st - Tony Crafter with:
THE 12 LABOURS OF HERCULES
1. Slay the Nemean Lion.
2. Slay the nine-headed Lernaean Hydra.
3. Capture the Golden Hind of Artemis.
4. Capture the Erymanthian Boar.
5. Clean the Augean stables in a single day.
6. Slay the Stymphalian Birds.
7. Capture the Cretan Bull.
8. Steal the Mares of Diomedes.
9. Obtain the girdle of Hippolyta, Queen of the Amazons.
10. Obtain the cattle of the monster Geryon.
11. Steal the apples of the Hesperides (He had the help of Atlas to pick them after Hercules had slain Ladon).
12. Capture and bring back Cerberus.
=
THE 12 MEANS HE EMPLOYED
1. Clubbing, then strangulation required.
2. Multiple decapitations.
3. He chased that deer for a year...
4. ... then pursued a pig.
5. Ugh! Up to his neck in horseshit.
6. Skill at archery slays feathered opponents.
7. He near throttled it to death.
8. He fed horses human flesh to placate them before capture.
9. He battled many feral female assailants to bag a babe's belt!
10. He ran across the Libyan desert and he finally got 'em in Erytheia.
11. Unable to cope alone, so pal lent a hand.
12. He snatched a crazy canine from Hell.
2nd - nedesto with:
Years ago in Ireland, there was a priest who was very anti-British. Every Sunday he'd blast them from the pulpit. He became so notorious that the Pope summoned the priest to Rome.
"Now look here, Father," said the Pope, "We want peace between the British and the Irish. You are not helping matters at all. Kiss my ring and then swear by the Virgin that you'll never ever mention the British again."
"But ... " the priest stammered.
"No buts," said the Pope. "Swear here and swear now or there'll be official trouble!"
"Aye, Holy Father," frowned the father. "All right."
The very next Sunday was Easter, and the caustic priest was back in the pulpit giving the annual Easter sermon.
He got to the part of the Easter story where Jesus said, "And so now one of you will betray Me."
The priest continued: "Then Saint Andrew lept up and said, 'Tis me Lord?' and the Lord said, 'Nay, Andy darlin'. Here now, sit down and dunna worry.'
"Then Saint John got up with tears in his eyes and cried, 'Or me Lord?' And the Lord said, 'Nay Nay, relax Johnny me boy, it's not you. Here now, sit down and dunna fret.'
"And then that wicked worthless mongrel Judas Iscariot slowly rose to his feet. And when he looked at the Lord he said, 'Blimey, Mate. Are ya thinking it's me?"
=
An Irishman moves into a tiny hamlet, walks into the pub and orders three beers.
The bartender draws the man three pints which he drinks alone.
An hour later he orders three more. This happens yet again.
The next evening the Irishman again orders the usual three pints at a time. And again. Soon the entire town is whispering about Old Three Pints.
A few days later, the bartender broaches the subject guardedly. "I sure don't mean to pry, okay? We're just wondering why is it do you always get three pints?" he says.
The man replies, "I've two brothers, you see. Paddy is in America, and Neil is in Australia. We always get some beers for each other to maintain the family bond."
With this answer Old Three Pints became a local celebrity and source of pride to the town.
Then, one day, he walks in and orders only two pints. The bartender pours them with a heavy heart. This went on the whole night. The word flies around town.
The next day, the bartender says, "We'd all just wanted to offer our sympathy to you for the loss of your brother. You know... two pints and all..."
The man ponders this a moment, and replies, "Oh Paddy and Neil are alive and well. It's just that I, myself, have decided to give up drinking for Lent."
3rd - Ellie Dent with:
One Sunday morning, a married couple attended a service at their local church. The man was so moved by the sermon, he went to shake the preacher's hand. 'Well, Reverend, that was stunning! - the best damn sermon I've heard!' The Reverend replied, 'Why, thank you, but I'll appreciate it if you avoid using profanity in our Lord's house.'
=
'Sorry, Reverend. I can't help myself. It was awesome; such ideas, and a damn fine sermon!' 'Thanks,' replied the Reverend, 'but I can't have you behaving that way - an impure way - in a Church.' 'OK, Reverend, but I thought your sermon was so damn good, I put three thousand dollars there in the collection plate.'
'No shit!' replied the Reverend.
THE SPECIAL CATEGORY
1st - nedesto with:
1. Brusque; mean
6. Underestimate
11. Propose
12. Minks
14. Mutiny
15. A nascent sun
16. Sol
17. A giant gaseous planet
19. Harness; strap
20. A wee lad
21. Tavern; saloon (8,4)
25. A church
27. Worried
29. Whisper at him or her "Hey you..."
31. SSN equivalent (6,9,6)
33. Acreage
35. Urchin
36. Lloyd's of London, e.g.
39. Incipience (8,4)
41. Arctic; bitter
42. A tear
46. Zodiac
48. All our pennies contain it
49. Hotelier
51. Senseless
52. Appropriate
53. Sure was one remote planet
54. Stretch
55. Felicitously
=
1. Unpalatable
2. Usual observances
3. Union
4. I zap hair
5. Yard construction (9,12)
6. Illness
7. Alien phoning home?
8. Reins
9. A dye
10. PC time-waster
13. War deity
18. Not hers
22. Spook's month
23. Super___
24. Quasi-stellar
26. A part in ears
28. Articulate
30. Sun-centered revolution
31. I play racquet games in here (7,5)
32. ___ minor
34. Genuine patriots
37. Portfolio
38. Plus; also
40. Watch; see
43. Seamen's deity
44. Connected
45. The Oracle was seen in here
47. Scarf
50. Hector, e.g.
2nd - Adie Pena with:
ASSISI
by Norman MacCaig
The dwarf with his hands on backwards
sat, slumped like a half-filled sack
on tiny twisted legs from which
sawdust might run,
outside the three tiers of churches built
in honour of St Francis, brother
of the poor, talker with birds, over whom
he had the advantage
of not being dead yet.
A priest explained
how clever it was of Giotto
to make his frescoes tell stories
that would reveal to the illiterate the goodness
of God and the suffering
of His Son. I understood
the explanation and
the cleverness.
A rush of tourists, clucking contentedly,
fluttered after him as he scattered
the grain of the Word. It was they who had passed
the ruined temple outside, whose eyes
wept pus, whose back was higher
than his head, whose lopsided mouth
said Grazie in a voice as sweet
as a child's when she speaks to her mother
or a bird's when it spoke
to St Francis.
BY YOUR GRACE ALONE
Almighty, eternal, just, and merciful God,
grant us in our misery
to do for You alone
what we know You want us to do,
and always
to desire what pleases You.
Thus,
inwardly cleansed,
interiorly enlightened,
and inflamed by the fire of the Holy Spirit,
may we be able to follow
in the footprints of Your beloved Son,
our Lord Jesus Christ.
And,
by Your grace alone,
may we make our way to You
Most High,
Who live and rule
in perfect Trinity and simple Unity,
and are glorified
God all-powerful
forever and ever.
Amen
=
PRAYER OF SAINT FRANCIS
Lord, make me an instrument of your peace,
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
Where there is injury, pardon;
Where there is doubt, faith;
Where there is despair, hope;
Where there is darkness, light;
Where there is sadness, joy.
O Divine Master,
grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled, as to console;
to be understood, as to understand;
to be loved, as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive.
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned,
and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.
Amen.
THE PRAYER BEFORE THE CRUCIFIX
Most high,
glorious God,
let your light fill the shadows of my heart
and grant me, Lord,
true faith,
certain hope,
perfect love,
awareness and knowing,
that I may fulfill Your holy will.
BROTHERS AND SISTERS, GOOD EVENING
"First of all, I would like to say a prayer for our bishop emeritus, Benedict XVI. Let us all pray together for him, let us all pray together for him so that the Lord my bless him and that the Madonna may protect him."
WE WHO SHUN OLD DAYS OF SAD SHADOWS
Pope Francis, His Holiness
Of the new Hallowed City,
Primate of Italy, watchfully
Educate the wounded woeful to be
Faithful and zealous, wash away dusty shadows of dusk,
Rescue the sad seduced child who asks unknowingly.
Awaken the wasteful wicked; do show us a
New nation we can build on
Christ's body of anguish.
Ignite us, watch us to succeed, be good
Servants of God, Knights of Sodality.
3rd - Tony Crafter with:
50 WAYS TO LEAVE YOUR LOVER
By
Paul Simon
"The problem is all inside your head," she said to me
The answer is easy if you take it logically
I'd like to help you in your struggle to be free
There must be fifty ways to leave your lover
She said it's really not my habit to intrude
Furthermore, I hope my meaning won't be lost or misconstrued
But I'll repeat myself, at the risk of being crude
There must be fifty ways to leave your lover
Fifty ways to leave your lover
You just slip out the back, Jack
Make a new plan, Stan
You don't need to be coy, Roy
Just get yourself free
Hop on the bus, Gus
You don't need to discuss much
Just drop off the key, Lee
And get yourself free
Ooh slip out the back, Jack
Make a new plan, Stan
You don't need to be coy, Roy
Just listen to me
Hop on the bus, Gus
You don't need to discuss much
Just drop off the key, Lee
And get yourself free
She said it grieves me so to see you in such pain
I wish there was something I could do to make you smile again
I said I appreciate that and would you please explain
About the fifty ways
She said why don't we both just sleep on it tonight
And I believe in the morning you'll begin to see the light
And then she kissed me and I realized she probably was right
There must be fifty ways to leave your lover
Fifty ways to leave your lover
You just slip out the back, Jack
Make a new plan, Stan
You don't need to be coy, Roy
Just get yourself free
Hop on the bus, Gus
You don't need to discuss much
Just drop off the key, Lee
And get yourself free
Slip out the back, Jack
Make a new plan, Stan
You don't need to be coy, Roy
Just listen to me
Hop on the bus, Gus
You don't need to discuss much
Just drop off the key, Lee
And get yourself free
=
50 WAYS TO PLEASE YOUR LOVER
(Do Not Go Gentle)
By
I. O. Bey
"Your problems mostly lie beneath the duvet," she told me;
"I wrote a book and it explains a thing or three,
The bed's a place of folly, pain and joy, and so you see
You must have fifty ways to please your lover."
She said, "Hey, I don't want to be discourteous or rude,
But I hear say your prowess in the boudoir is, well... crude,
So if you're lying, in confusion, in the nude,
You've got those fifty ways to please your lover
Yes, fifty ways to tease your lover."
You just jump in the sack, Mac
Tie up her feet, Pete,
To the foot of yo' bed, Ned
Yes, listen to me.
Truss up the hands, Dan,
Go as rough as you like, Mike
Slap her backside Clyde
But don't set her free.
You just jump in the sack, Mac,
Tie up the feet, Pete
To the foot of yo' bed, Ned,
Yes, listen to me.
Truss up the hands, Dan,
Be as cruel as you like, Mike,
Make her bum sting, Bing,
Just don't let her free.
She said coyly, "Every woman loves her pleasure with a sting,
Now, all that lovey-dovey nonsense just don't mean a thing,
But lying, cruelly locked in shackles sure gives you a zing
In joyous ways."
She urged, "Go buy my book and you'll find out about it all,
Wow, it's joyful being cuffed up to a cellar wall!"
So I groaned softly, "Yes I'm willing and I'm cool
To try one of fifty ways to please your lover.
Fifty ways to tease your lover."
You just jump in the sack, Mac,
Tie up her feet, Pete
To the foot of yo' bed Ned,
Just don't set her free.
Truss up the hands, Dan,
Be as cruel as you like, Mike,
Whack her backside, Clyde
Just don't let her free.
Jump in the sack, Mac,
Tie up the feet, Pete
To the foot of yo' bed, Ned,
Just listen to me.
Truss up the hands, Dan,
Go as tough as you like, Mike,
Make her bum sting, Bing,
But don't set her free.
THE RUDE CATEGORY
1st - View with:
Weird fantasies =
Wife and a sister.
2nd - Christopher Sturdy with:
Notion: Shit happens! =
Hope not in his pants.
3rd - David Bourke with:
Linda Lovelace / Harry Reems in Deep Throat =
Semen heaped all over her in dirty oral act.
| Home | | The Anagrammy Awards | Enter the Forum | Facebook | The Team |  |
| Information | | Awards Rules | Forum FAQ | Anagrams FAQ | History | Articles | |
| Resources | | Anagram Artist Software | Generators | On-line | Books | Websites | |
| Archive | | Winners | Nominations | Hall of Fame | Anagrammasia | Literary | |
| Competition | | Vote | Current Nominations | Leader Board | Latest Results | Old Results | Rankings | |
| Miscellaneous | | Tribute Page | Records | Sitemap | Search | Anagram Checker | Email Us | Donate | |
| Anagrammy Awards | © 1998-2024 Last updated 10th May, 2016 |