Anagrammy Placegetters for October 1999
All the highly-placed anagrams from the October 1999 Anagrammy Awards.
[ Previous month ] [ Back to index ] [ Next month ]THE GENERAL CATEGORY
1st - Don P. Fortier with:
The best laid plans of mice and men =
And sometimes blind fate can help...
2nd - Navigator with:
Rome was not built in a day =
Any labour I do wants time.
3rd - Jon Gearhart with:
Hermaphrodite =
Adept him OR her.
THE ENTERTAINMENT CATEGORY
1st - Mike Keith with:
Isn't Calista Flockhart really sexy? =
She's flatly ill, tacky, anorexic star.
2nd - Tom Myers with:
Wilt Chamberlain =
Nice arm with ball!
eq.3rd - Andrew Denny with:
Star Wars, Episode One: The Phantom Menace =
"Space as entertainment? Whoops! Oh dear me!"
eq.3rd - Janet Muggeridge with:
"If you or any of your I.M. Force is caught or killed, the Secretary will disavow any knowledge of your actions." =
"Oy, why do you work for official liars like that (congressman or senator)?!"
"I get a fee."
"Your view - unduly icy cold!"
eq.3rd - Graham Perkins with:
Walking With Dinosaurs =
Ah, I know: "Wild Giants 'R' Us".
eq.3rd - Mick Tully with:
Walking With Dinosaurs =
Ah, so win wild UK ratings.
THE TOPICAL CATEGORY
1st - Ben Zimmer with:
Mars Climate Orbiter =
Meter miscalibrator!
2nd - Art Day with:
"Team Of The Century" =
The true fact? Money!
eq.3rd - Daniel F. Etter with:
Nuclear accident =
I can't duel cancer.
eq.3rd - Tom Myers with:
Another Asian nuclear accident =
Actual chain reaction seen. Darn!
THE RUDE CATEGORY
1st - Daniel F. Etter with:
Smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your lips. =
Which is better to do? Sip thy ol' tea? Do messy cunnilingus?
2nd - Janet Muggeridge with:
Sanitary towel =
Lay in sore twat.
3rd - Larry Brash with:
"Old El Paso" =
Ladles poo.
THE SPAM CATEGORY
1st - Larry Brash with:
Here's A great place to find everything you need for business and Christmas. =
Send in cash? Gad! Get your very shit-brained spam off Usenet, arsehole-cretin.
2nd - Jon Gearhart with:
Please check us out for all you gift and shopping needs. =
(1) Slide the log up ass.
(2) Crap.
(3) Then go fondle a penis, you fuck!
3rd - Don P. Fortier with:
My name is Ron, I'm 24 and I hate getting spammed, so this message is personalized just for you! =
Motto: Get prize inanity from spamming jughead 24 hours a day! Immense ass! Senseless idiot!
THE LONG CATEGORY
1st - Don P. Fortier with:
Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?
Thou art more lovely and more temperate:
Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,
And summer's lease hath all too short a date.
=
Shakespeare's truly grand romantic love poem added seasonal themes:
Told adored maid how her beauty might almost shame that of Mother
Nature.
Lush, really amorous!
2nd - Larry Brash with:
Please check us out for all you gift and shopping needs. We carry
things from adventure trips, art, lodging, gifts, furniture, golf,
cosmetics, herbs and vitamins and much, much more.
=
I'm another bloody uncaring spammer who posts her fucking fraud
to alt.anagrams. I spend lots of hectic hours spamming Usenet.
I sell defective crud, frigging defunct TV's. Hurry!
3rd - Richard Brodie with: [Proverbs 20:1]
Wine is a mocker, strong drink is raging:
and whosoever is deceived thereby is not wise.
=
Martinis, whisky, gin, screwdrivers? Tie one on in bars?
I'd avoid these grogs. We need Coke!
THE PEOPLE'S NAMES CATEGORY
eq.1st - Richard Brodie with:
Tonya Harding =
Darn hit! Agony!
eq.1st - Daniel F. Etter with:
A Homer Simpson =
Mr. Homo Sapiens.
3rd - Tom Myers with:
Senator Slade Gorton =
So large and so rotten.
THE OTHER NAMES CATEGORY
1st - Tom Myers with:
Intel Celeron Processor out =
Serious teen-porn collector.
eq.2nd - Andrew Denny with:
Houses of Parliament =
Is an atmosphere foul.
eq.2nd - Daniel F. Etter with:
The Berlin Wall =
We'll ban Hitler.
THE ANAGRAM SET CATEGORY
1st - Janet Muggeridge with:
Porcelain toilets =
To clear piles into.
Lose crap in toilet.
Crap lies on toilet.
Septic latrine/loo.
Note pale clitoris.
2nd - Tom Myers with:
Yeltsin In Hospital =
Insanity? Still hope?
He's ill, nation tipsy.
Ill? Pity. He's no saint!
eq.3rd - Wayne Baisley with:
Four Weddings and a Funeral =
Our Flawed Ugandan Friends.
DUI: Ronald W. Reagan Snuffed.
New Deal Fad: Unfairgrounds.
A Few Gnufoundland Raiders.
Fred Sulfured Now And Again.
Niagara Flows Underfunded.
Diana's Underground Waffle.
Undiagnosed Funeral Dwarf.
A Is For Anal: We'd Refund Dung.
Frau Nailed Down (Sang Freud).
DNA: Awful Dangerous Friend.
eq.3rd - Richard Brodie with:
Reba McEntire's Ranch House =
Reach her mansion: best cure.
Near each other, crises numb.
Inn cares. Ease much, brother.
Combine such hearts nearer.
Embrace her south inn's care.
Combines aches nearer hurt.
A nice southerner's chamber.
No such tears in her embrace.
Has nice cure? Amen, brothers!
Breathes charm on insecure.
Then rare embrace cushions.
Her chamber's a tension cure.
Oh, inn's embrace cures heart.
THE SPECIAL CATEGORY
1st - David Bourke with:
Diana,
The Princess Of Wales
2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
Sylvia
Plath: Words
3rd - Dan Fortier with:
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall;
All the King's horses, and all the King's men,
Couldn't put Humpty together again.
=
An egg that's sat out on my ledge
My kin hath push'd against unkind edge
Perch'd up up up too tall tall tall
Then... My my my that harmful sprawl!
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