Tony Crafter

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Original text in yellow, anagram in pink.

(IS THIS THE WAY TO) AMARILLO?

Sha la la la la la la
Sha la la la la la la
Sha la la la la la la

When the day is dawning,
On a Texas Sunday morning,
How I long to be there,
With Marie who's waiting for me there.
Every lonely city,
Where I hang my hat,
Ain't as half as pretty,
As where my baby's at.

(Chorus)
Is this the way to Amarillo?
Every night I've been hugging my pillow,
Dreaming dreams of Amarillo,
And sweet Marie who waits for me.
Show me the way to Amarillo,
I've been weeping like a willow,
Crying over Amarillo,
And sweet Marie who waits for me.

Sha la la la la la la
Sha la la la la la la
Sha la la la la la la
And Marie who waits for me.

There's a church bell ringing, hear the song of joy that it's singing,
For the sweet Maria,
And the guy who's coming to see her;
Just beyond the highway, there's an open plain,
And it keeps me going,
Through the wind and rain

(Chorus)

Sha la la la la la la
Sha la la la la la la
Sha la la la la la la
And Marie who waits for me.

(HAPPY GIGGING IN) ROBIN'S VILLA

La la la la la la la
La la la la la la la
La la la la la la la

When a grey day's dawning,
On a frosty London morning,
Wanna sail somewhere hot,
With Cherie on a luxury sea-yacht.
Any English city,
Where I tout for votes,
Isn't half as pretty
As east Miami's coast.

(Chorus)
Is this the way to Robin's villa?
England's like a ship with no tiller,
My deputy's a brash gorilla,
We want a rest, Cherie and me.
We'll jet to showman Robin's villa,
Had enough of all terror-guerillas,
I'd rather gig in Robin's villa,
Where he'll let me stay for free!

La la la la la la la
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Another holiday for free!

All the masses hate me, all the MPs they denigrate me,
Saying I'll do damage,
Immigration I'll mismanage.
I'm jetting to Miami, where there's a Bee Gee's home,
He'll let me stay for nothing,
So that is where I'm gonna roam.

(Chorus)

La La la la la la la
Wa wa wa wa wa wa wa
Wa wa wa wa wa wa wa
Why does nobody like me?

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LADY MADONNA
by
The Beatles

Lady Madonna, children at your feet
Wonder how you manage to make ends meet
Who find the money when you pay the rent
Did you think that money was heaven sent

Friday night arrives without a suitcase
Sunday morning creeping like a nun
Monday's child has learned to tie his bootlegs
See how they run

Lady Madonna, baby at your breast
Wonders how you manage to feed the rest
Pa pa pa pa...
See how they run

Lady Madonna lying on the bed
Listen to the music playing in your head

Tuesday afternoon is never ending
Wednesday morning papers didn't come
Thursday night you stocking needed mending
See how they run

Lady Madonna, children at your feet
Wonder how you manage to make ends meet.

REBEL MADONNA
Anon

Rebel Madonna, with designer-child,
Wonder how you manage to be that wild;
Who minds the toddlers when you on the stage?
Mama don't you think you should act your age?

Friday, on that stage you really surgin',
Sunday evenin' prayin' like a nun
Monday mornin' sees you, Like A Virgin
Mum with two sons.

Slinky Madonna, tarty, pointed chest,
When d'you get the time off to have any rest?
Dee dee dee dee ...
Papa Don't Preach.

Cyclone Madonna, flying here and there,
Penned a trendy pop tune, sounded Like A Prayer!

Tuesday afternoon Ashtanga yoga,
Wednesday mornin', ache a teeny bit,
Thursday, rushed to buy that brand new toga,
See how it fits!

English Madonna, she my honey bee,
She my wedded woman, my name's Guy Ritchie!

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"We are all lying in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." (Oscar Wilde)

"A night sky can liberate awe, glamour, or the astrologer, in us destitute fellows!"

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"Gold is good in its place but living, brave, patriotic men are better than gold."

"Painted glitter? It's good - but epic, God-given valor is better." (Abraham Lincoln)

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SINGIN' IN THE RAIN
by
Arther Freed and Nacio Brown

I'm singing in the rain
Just singing in the rain
What a glorious feeling
I'm happy again
I'm laughing at clouds
So dark up above
The sun's in my heart
And I'm ready for love

Let the stormy clouds chase
Everyone from the place
Come on with the rain
I've a smile on my face
I'll walk down the lane
With a happy refrain
Singing, singing in the rain
In the rain.


I'm singing in the rain
Just singing in the rain
What a glorious feeling
I'm happy again
I walk down the lane
With a happy refrain
I'm singing, singing in the rain
In the rain
In the rain

SINGING IN A REIGN
Her Singing Royal Majesty

I'm singin' in a reign,
I'm singin' in a reign,
I just watched that wonderful movie again,
Dame Helen played me,
So triumphantly,
The Oscar she won and a BAFTA or three.

So, now they've all seen,
That I'm still a good bean,
I'm forthright and funny,
Not haughty or mean,
I trip down Park Lane,
Back in favour again,
Thrivin', singin' as I reign,
As I reign

I'm singin' while I reign,
I'm singin' while I reign
Though Charlie, Prince Philip
And Will are inane;
That Harry's insane,
Is he sniffing cocaine?
Yet I'm thankful 'n' happy in a reign.
I won't wane
Through the pain.

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CANDLE IN THE WIND
by
Elton John

Goodbye Norma Jean
Though I never knew you at all
You had the grace to hold yourself
While those around you crawled
They crawled out of the woodwork
And they whispered into your brain
They set you on the treadmill
And they made you change your name

(Chorus)
And it seems to me you lived your life
Like a candle in the wind
Never knowing who to cling to
When the rain set in
And I would have liked to have known you
But I was just a kid
Your candle burned out long before
Your legend ever did

Loneliness was tough
The toughest role you ever played
Hollywood created a superstar
And pain was the price you paid
Even when you died
Oh the press still hounded you
All the papers had to say
Was that Marilyn was found in the nude

(Chorus)

Goodbye Norma Jean
From the young man in the 22nd row
Who sees you as something as more than sexual
More than just our Marilyn Monroe

(Chorus)

PEEING IN THE WIND
Joe Public

Goodbye Tony Blair,
No-one ever liked you at all,
You put your country in the mire
While around George Bush you crawled;
Oh how you crawled, just like a puppy,
And you danced to that hothead's tune,
Now we are on war's treadmill,
Oh, thank God you leave in June.

(Chorus)
And it seems to me you lived your life
Unashamed, a man of lies,
Never knowing what the truth was,
How you were despised;
Oh, and now we need to tell you
No, we weren't taken in,
And yet who heeds our judgement?
It's like peeing in the wind.

The Leader's role was hard,
The hardest job you have ever had,
It made an alien monster of you,
And you lost your country's trust.
And now you're dancing off,
Oh how the Press they'll undermine you
And all they'll have to say,
Is, "Tony Blair? He shunned the truth."

(Chorus)

Goodbye, ex-Head Man,
From a kindred Englishman who's heard
You'll convert to Roman Catholic soon;
Good God! Say 22 'Hail Marys'!

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HIPS DON'T LIE
by
Shakira (featuring Wyclef Jean)

Ladies up in here tonight
No fighting, no fighting
We got the refugees up in here
No fighting, no fighting

Shakira, Shakira

I never really knew that she could dance like this
She makes a man want to speak Spanish
Como se llama (si), bonita (si), mi casa (si, Shakira Shakira), su casa
Shakira, Shakira

Oh baby when you talk like that
You make a woman go mad
So be wise and keep on
Reading the signs of my body

And I'm on tonight
You know my hips don't lie
And I'm starting to feel it's right
All the attraction, the tension
Don't you see baby, this is perfection

Hey Girl, I can see your body moving
And it's driving me crazy
And I didn't have the slightest idea
Until I saw you dancing

And when you walk up on the dance floor
Nobody cannot ignore the way you move your body, girl
And everything so unexpected - the way you right and left it
So you can keep on shaking it

I never really knew that she could dance like this
She makes a man want to speak Spanish
Como se llama (si), bonita (si), mi casa (si, Shakira Shakira), su casa
Shakira, Shakira

Oh baby when you talk like that
You make a woman go mad
So be wise and keep on
Reading the signs of my body

And I'm on tonight
You know my hips don't lie
And I am starting to feel you boy
Come on lets go, real slow
Don't you see baby asi es perfecto

Oh I know I am on tonight my hips don't lie
And I am starting to feel it's right
All the attraction, the tension
Don't you see baby, this is perfection
Shakira, Shakira

Oh boy, I can see your body moving
Half animal, half man
I don't, don't really know what I'm doing
But you seem to have a plan
My will and self restraint
Have come to fail now, fail now
See, I am doing what I can, but I can't so you know
That's a bit too hard to explain

Baila en la calle de noche
Baila en la calle de d’a

Baila en la calle de noche
Baila en la calle de d’a

I never really knew that she could dance like this
She makes a man want to speak Spanish
Como se llama (si), bonita (si), mi casa (si, Shakira Shakira), su casa
Shakira, Shakira

Oh baby when you talk like that
You know you got me hypnotized
So be wise and keep on
Reading the signs of my body

Senorita, feel the conga, let me see you move like you come from Colombia

Mira en Barranquilla se baila as’, say it!
Mira en Barranquilla se baila as’


Yeah
She's so sexy every man's fantasy a refugee like me back with the Fugees from a third-world country
I go back like when 'pac carried crates for Humpty Humpty
I need a whole club dizzy
Why the CIA wanna watch us?
Colombians and Haitians
I ain't guilty, it's a musical transaction
No more do we snatch ropes
Refugees run the seas 'cause we own our own boats

I'm on tonight, my hips don't lie
And I'm starting to feel you boy
Come on let's go, real slow
Baby, like this is perfecto

Oh, you know I am on tonight and my hips don't lie
And I am starting to feel it's right
The attraction, the tension
Baby, like this is perfection

No fighting
No fighting

LIPS DON'T LIE
by
Tony Blair (featuring his Spin Doctor)

(Narrator)
People in here tonight
No fightin', no fightin'
We got refugees in here
No fightin', no fightin'

Or kickin', or kickin'

(Spin Doc.)
Oh, he didn't know that he'd be dissed like this
Though he always talk in double-talk,
He say: "It's true!" (I'm lying) "Let's move on!" (let's stay here) "I am wrong," (not really)
Cackle, cackle, cackle.

(Blair)
Ooh, people when you talk so bad
You make a man so mad
So be wise, watch my lips and
Don't read the signs of my body

Oh, I say tonight
You know my lips don't lie
And I'm startin' to feel it, ah!
You're believing what I am saying
For I am a master politician!

(N.)
Gee, Blair, I can see your lips moving
And it's driving me crazy
'Cause I ain't got a single idea
Of what you are saying

And when you talk to your people
No-one can ignore the way you move those snakish lips,
And everything is as we expected - the way you duck and dodge
So you can keep on fakin' it.

(S.D.)
Oh, he didn't know that he'd be dissed like this
Though he always talk in double-talk,
He say: "It's true!" (I'm lying) "Let's move on!" (let's stay here) "I am wrong!" (not really)
Cackle, cackle, cackle.

(B.)
Ooh, people when you talk so bad
You make a man so mad,
So be wise, watch my lips and
Don't read the signs of my body

Oh, I say tonight
You know my lips don't lie
And I'm startin' to feel it, ah!
You're believing what I am saying
For I am a master politician!

You must hear what I say tonight, for my lips won't lie
And I'm starting to see that you
Are believing, all of the garbage,
For I am a master politician!
Amazing, amazing!

(N.)
Oh, Blair I can see the tongue is talkin'
I see confusion - a half-lie and a half-truth
Don't understand what you are sayin'
But you seem to have a plan
For Iraq, Afghanistan,
Britain and Iran, but not your fellow man
See, I am tryin' to understand what goes on inside that brain but, wow,
That is too hard to explain

Aha Blair!
Aha Bliar!

Aha Blair!
Aha Bliar!

(S.D.)
Oh, he didn't know that he'd be dissed like this
Though he always talk in double-talk,
He say: "It's true!" (I'm lying) "Let's move on!" (let's stay here) "I am wrong!" (not really)
Cackle, cackle, cackle.

(B.)
Ooh, people when you talk so bad
You make a man so mad,
So be wise, watch my lips and
Don't read the signs of my body

(N)
So let me see you showing some sincerity, no eyewash, showing me some verity.

Akuna, akuna, akuna-matata
Akuna, akuna, akuna-matata

Gee
He's a thinking man's nightmare, he's like a Kafkaesque crank-case
Who has to kick off some bazookas with obnoxious jackass George Bush,
Based on incoherent inaccuracies.
No backbone, only backache, backbenchers, inefficiences, assassinations.
He suffers no conscience, has no balance or goal.
He has his weary assessors, his woesome wife: Cherie-baby,
His Bahamas hideaway.

(B.)
I say tonight my lips don't lie
And I'm startin' to feel it, ah!
I am a winner,
Oh, I am a master politician!

Oh, I say tonight my lips don't lie
And I'm startin' to feel it ah!
You're believing what I am saying,
For I am a master politician!

(N.)
No fightin'
No fightin'

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Updated: May 10, 2016


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