Anagrammy Awards Results - November, 1998

23 votes have been received and its time to announce the winners!

Here are all the winners and placegetters. To gain a place at least 3 votes must have been received. Ties were broken by the Awardsmaster.


As usual, the General Category was one of the most crowded with 15 nominations. As a result, Meyran's great anagram really had to stand out to win here. It certainly did that, allowing Meyran (obviously a "tit man") to pick up his 3rd ever Anagrammy.

1st. Meyran Kraus with: 8
Silicone Transplants. =
Plan nicer tits on lass.

2nd. Tom Myers with: 5
Election results. =
Lies - let's recount.

3rd. Keith Lehman with: 4
Winter is coming =
I'm into screwing.


11 of the 12 nominees in the Entertainment category captured at least one vote, so evenly placed was this category. The first three places jostled for positions throughout and ended in a tie. After much consideration, I chose Art Day's anagram narrowly over Meyran's, even though I had voted for the latter. While I like the theme of Meyran's 'gram, Art's was technically superior and sounded like an ad for the movie. This is Art's first success in the Anagrammy.

1st. Art Day with: 5
"I Still Know What You Did Last Summer". =
Mutant slasher, dim kids - it'll wow you.

2nd. Meyran Kraus with: 5
Johannes Vermeer van Delft's "Girl with a pearl earring". =
'Teen and her jewel'- performing ravishing art. All raves!

3rd. Ernesto Guiraldes with: 4
"The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert" =
These cheerful divas feted on queer's art, in deft plot.


Christmas anagrams did best in the Topical Category this month. Clinton-related anagrams which have dominated in recent months waned somewhat. Johnnie's anagram was the front runner with it's clever social comment on Christmas. His 4th Anagrammy.

1st. Johnnie Burning Elk with: 10
Seasons Greetings. =
Tense Aggressions.

2nd. Mick Tully with: 6
The Monica Lewinsky Tapes. =
Listen.... Women yack.... Ah, spite!

3rd. Richard Peers with: 3
Colin Montgomerie wins the European Order of Merit again. =
Re: ace golfer on tee, hits wood, on green in minimum par ratio.


Jon Gearhart's masterpiece could have won the Rude, Long or Spam Category, but it was in the Rude Category where it beat off a solid challenge from Meyran Kraus. Jon, a master of long anagrams, came away with his second Anagrammy.

1st. Jon Gearhart with: 9
If you're skeptical, that's okay. Just make the call and see for yourself. My job is to inform you, your job is to make your own decision.
My job? A skill. I screw you, too. Your job? To take my jism anally. Make your decision soon - I found fifty other ass-fuckers out there, ape.

2nd. Meyran Kraus with: 8
A Wet T-Shirt Contest. =
Wants hot, erect tits.

3rd. Kevin Hale with: 3
Haemorrhoids =
Oh! Had sore rim!!


I knew when I created this anagram for the Spam Category that it was a good one. Attacking spammers is one of my great loves of mine, so I get a lot of practice in this genre. This was my 3rd Spam Category Anagrammy.

1st. Larry Brash with: 8
"Look at this. This may be the most significant letter you receive this
year!!" =
"Hi, these scams are not legal, you shitty trickster. Ye be a thief. I
vomit on it!"

2nd. Jon Gearhart with: 5 =

3rd. Daniel Fredrick Etter with: 4
This really can make you easy money !! It works !! =
Eat my shit, wanker! You lyin' yokel! A sore scam!


I thought that it was appropriate that Richard and my attempts at Lewis Carroll's Jabberwocky were nominated in the Long Category. I am sure that that Carroll, being an anagrammatist, would have approved, especially of Richard's poetic reworking of this classic. Wait til the December Anagrammy and see Jon Gearhart's anagramming of the whole poem.

1st. Richard Brodie with: 11
'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe. =
'Twas eerie, and the evil worms
Did slither by. O, in the gloom,
All hairy were the maggot germs,
And bugs and bats, live, by the tomb.

2nd. Larry Brash with: 3
'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe. =
We hobby anagrammatists in alt.anagrams love to reorder big words into
the weighty embedded gem. He vet silly bullshit, eh?


Mick Tully opened a strong lead on the second day of voting in the Name Category. The subject of the anagram was understandably alarmed when Mick found out his "secret identity". It's OK, Mattias, its just the way the letters fall, believe me. Mick's 4th Anagrammy.

1st. Mick Tully with: 8
Matthias N. Ritchie. =
I am the Antichrist!

2nd. Daniel Fredrick Etter with: 4
Doctor Kevorkian. =
To invoke Dr. Croak.

Place Name

The Place Category with only 5 final nominees meant everyone got at least 2 votes while Richard Brodie and I battled it out. Richard finished with a powerful run picking up 6 of the last 7 votes and won easily

1st. Richard Brodie with: 10
Sleeman's Brewing & Malting Co. Ltd. =
Mingling beer & lady's pants won't calm me.

2nd. Larry Brash with: 6
Sexey's School for Boys, Bruton. =
Only for boys? Scour both sexes.

3rd. Ernesto Guiraldes with: 3
Our Christmas, in summer =
Some Christians murmur


With 15 entrants, the Set Category is always close. Tom Myers won in a photo finish. This was Tom Myers's 3rd Anagrammy.

1st. Tom Myers with: 5
Broadstairs Lighthouse =
Abort ghoulish disaster
Lost use harbor sight-aid
Distraught sailor, he sob

2nd. Meyran Kraus with: 4
A Wet T-Shirt Contest. =
Wants hot, erect tits.
Water tits, not chest!
Watch & sort teen tits.

3rd. Larry Brash with: 4
I think you are totally out of your league. You shouldn't say stuff like that. You should STOP IT!! =
Yuk, get out, you opinionated shit-head! Truthfully, you're a total fool. You slothful ass. It's yuk!!
Post your dud shit on another site, you ugly asshole. You talk like a fool. Youthful fatuity! Tut!
Piss off thusly, you troglodyte! Australians, like I, hate you! You talk the fool! Out, you nut! Thud!!


The Special Category always contains some very special nominations and this month was no exception. Richard Brodie's eloquent and poignant rendition of the famous 23th Psalm got my vote and enough of the other votes to win in a close contest with the reigning champion, Jon Gearhart. Richard's 3th Anagrammy for the month and 10th overall.

The anagrams have been snipped for space.

1st. Richard Brodie with: 10
The Lord is my shepherd;

2nd. Jon Gearhart with: 5

3rd. Keith Lehman with: 3

Updated: May 10, 2016


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