Anagrammy Awards Results - February, 1999

Somewhat belatedly this month, here are the winners for the February
1999 Anagrammy Awards.

25 voters submitted their choices despite the problems that we had with
the voting page.


This was, as it usually is, a close contest and ended it a tie. After
due consideration, I pick Wayne's anagram here as the one that I liked
the best.

1st. Wayne Baisley with: genetically modified food= Died of E. coli, FDA
lying to me. 5 votes

2d. Tom Meyers with: circumcision operation= Caution: micro-precision!
5 votes

3rd. Art Day with: Fluoride toothpaste= Fail? So, teeth drop out. 4


Krakers led easily from the start with one of his classic literary
anagrams. New member Dan Fortier did well and picked up a lot of voting
towards the end of the voting.

1st. Steve Krakowski with: A lesson's been due, boy! Silver turns
traitor.= "Treasure Island" by Robert Louis Stevenson. 11 votes

2nd. Dan Fortier with: "You've got mail"= I'm a guy to love. 7 votes

eq 3rd. Larry Brash with: Rumpole of the Bailey= Pomeroy. The bail
fuel. 3 votes

eq 3rd. Mick Tully with: Noddy and Big Ears = Gay? Sordid. Banned. 3


Janet picked up her first Anagrammy and it was certainly time for her to
taste success since she has been such an active member since she
discovered us only a couple of months ago..

1st. Janet Muggeridge with: Weather forecast: it will be very mild and
sunny today= Met. data didn't tell: rainy, icy, we shovel February
snow. 9 votes

eq 2nd. Mike Hatton with: Glenn Hoddle sacked= England's deck holed 5

eq 2nd. William Tunstall-Pedoe with: "William Jefferson Clinton,
President of the USA"= "Intern fellated his penis off. Moral Justice
Now!" 5 votes


I was delighted to see that this beauty was a winner. It just goes to
show that length is not everything.

1st. Larry Brash with: Coitus interruptus= Cunt users rip it out! 10

2nd. Janet Muggeridge with: Apologies are NOT accepted. This is
alt.anagrams, remember? I expect nothing less than the rudest of 'grams.
Heck... I'd be disappointed if a few nasty ones didn't pop up!=
Let a mite nest in Rodley’s genitals, then he canít screw Brenda’s
orifice. Get "shampoo", shithead. If goes drip, pop ointment on tampax
pad. Pad pubes. Get AIDS, assfucker! 7 votes

3rd. William Tunstall-Pedoe with: "William Jefferson Clinton, President
of the USA"= "Intern fellated; Major lies; Now cut off his penis!" 4


This was a close one between me and new member, Paul Howard. Paul's
spamagram is quite brilliant and contain excellent spammer abuse.

1st. Paul Martin Howard with: A little while back, I was browsing
through some newsgroups, just like you are now. I came across an
article similar to this that said you could make thousands of dollars
within weeks with only an initial investment of six dollars! I thought:
"Damn, this must be a scam and illegal". =
It was, but as that didn't stop you, you chose to vex us all with a new
incarnation of the same limited story. Oh, I wish this jerk's cash
claims were true, but I know such unmitigated trash is illegal and lacks
kudos. So, we ignore mail or blame? O no! I'll find anagrams among all
this swill. 8 votes

2nd. Larry Brash with: Turn your computer into a 24 hr. a day cash
machine!! = A rich spammer (a nut), 24; I hurry to con and cheat you. 6

3rd. Richard Peers with: Diet-less Diet Weight Loss No Dieting or
Exercising and No Drugs, 100% Refund, Herbs and Vitamins= 100% shit
message! Excise this brainless sodding net-turd. Die, die, virgin! O
England, frown on turd! 5 votes


Another close one, this time between Richard Brodie and myself. i gave
Richard the nod here.

1st. Richard Brodie with: Can one go upon hot coals, and his feet not be
burned?= So, can he pee on ice and both of gonads not turn blue? 7

2nd. Larry Brash with: Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou amongst women and blessed is the fruit of thy womb,
Jesus Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour
of our death. Amen. =
Immaculate and pregnant? Horror! She's deluded about her abdominal
mass. Whose fetus? From where? Your Jewish boyfriend's flesh got you in
the family way, not Mr Ghost! That HRT tale of hers don't fool us. 7

3rd. Janet Muggeridge with: Some penance for making jibes about an
unhealthy European diet= Bread 'n' muesli 'n' bananas 'n' fruit juice
keep me on top. Oh yeah, go eat! 5 votes


Another close event, but Art maintained a slim lead in this Category throughout.

Art Day with: Pat Robertson = ...or bent pastor? 8 votes

Janet Muggeridge with: Sir William MacPherson= Low Mr Chair - I slip
names 7 votes

Mick Tully with: Lord Louis Mountbatten = IRA TNT booms - undue toll. 4


New boy, Dan Fortier, led easily with an improvement on a famous
anagram. this was questioned as to it's originality, but I was happy to
accept it and it think that it is better than well known one.

1st. Dan Fortier with: United States Of America = Its cause: attain
freedom 10 votes

2nd. Janet Muggeridge with: Sinclair and Girnigoe Castle= Gaelic
garrison: is it clan den? 6 votes

3rd. Tom Myers with: Outback Steakhouses= Steak about chokes us 4


A three-way tie. So hard to pick, but....... I'll go with Tom's as he
had few letters to work with and came up with a different synonym for
ascending in each anagram.

1st. Tom Myers with: 5 votes
Easter Holiday =
Deathly, I arose!
Arise! Holy date.
Deity heal, soar.

eq 2nd. Richard Brodie with: 5 votes
Senate Impeachment Trial =
Terminate the Special Man!
Halt intimate menace Pres.
In a statement: Replace him!

eq 2nd. Janet Muggeridge with: 5 votes
Please don't mention the war.=
Tend to weep: Torah men slain.
Demean Hitler POWs? Not neat!
Interned POWs meant a lot, eh?


Only 2 in this category and it looked like Mey would win it easily, but
Earle rallied in late voting with 6 of 7 consecutive votes. Meyran then
picked up the last 3 votes to clinch a win.

 Mey K. with: 14 votes
The Libyan desert=
Let's be in dry heat! [...]

The Sahara desert=
Ass rather heated...

The Nubian desert=
Burned in the east.

The Gobi desert=
Be hot? Gets dire!

The Great Australian desert=
Gets real arid. Sun? Heat-treat!

 Earle Jones with: 10 votes
Metaphors denoted,
Hastened, promoted,

Top anthems eroded,
Phrase not demoted,

The mad prose noted,
Poem ends, throated.

[Each line= Damn the Torpedoes!]
This month no one stood out by winning 2 or more categories. but Janet
Muggeridge deserves special mention for being a placegetter in 6
categories - one win, three 2nds and two 3rds. Well done!

Updated: May 10, 2016


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